Wow, how old is he? He IS NOT being “honest” with you. Far from it. He got you to plunk down some substantial cash so that you two could move in together. Something happened here, and I doubt it had anything to do with YOU. It's him.
Doesn't matter how long you've been together when someone shows you who the really are. Believe him & run in the other direction. How do you recover from this? YOU DON'T. Wow.
No no no, this is a contractual agreement & if you don't perform, you may be sued by the seller! WTF??? Does he not understand this?
So barring that scenario, let's say the seller let's you out of the contractual obligation and doesn't sue you both….okay, then he's being quite cavalier with YOUR MONEY. WTF is wrong with him?
And who the hell does something like this? I would sue him, I would sue him so very hot. What he did here is almost unforgiveable, and if you stick around after being screwed like this by him, get ready for more of his bullshit.
Make it fun. Tell him to make a list of 5 items he'd want and Santa will choose one from taht list. This way it will still be kind of a surprise. Give him paper and pen and leave him to it.
this was pretty much my reaction as well. everyone in this story is toxic af. OP, stay broken up with him this time, block him and move on. disconnect yourself from this toxic mess otherwise you’re as bad as they are.
I don't want to. But if things get worse, I think so, because at this point we are just hurting each other. Maybe I'm too anxious of a person for a relationship right now. And we just aren't communicating where we understand each other. It's frustrating.
Most relationships come to end because someone appears on the scene. That could be u, pursue this if u think u two are genuinely better fit, nobody owns anyone, and you’re all still basically teenagers
You found all that and are still trying to salvage this “relationship”. Not only are you blind you’re in severe denial, I highly recommend you run actually sprint away from this immediately. Do not waste another day or thought on this guy.
This might blow up in your face, but the risk may be worth it if the alternative is being in a sexless marriage for the rest of your life. You got the go-ahead from your wife so go ahead.
Ok, without looking at your post history, here's my initial thought: whatever she helped you out with when you got married, should be the same (or a bit more) that you help her out with.
If it was going to be difficult to return this money, you shouldn't have accepted it (and spent it) in the first place. So try to come up with an equal sum so you can be even.
“She's not a pathological liar but, you list a whole bunch of examples that show she's a pathological liar. She doesn't need therapy, that's an excuse to keep playing the victim, instead of actually learning a lesson. Time for you to learn one too. This relationship is one huge mistake and by standing by this mistake you are only punishing yourself. All you are doing is giving the mistake more time to lie and manipulate the situation. If she loved or cared for anyone more than herself, she wouldn't be doing dangerous things that should and will get her deported. Enjoy your new cat and don't fall in love with human trash.
So it sounds like she has you on standby/backup while this other guy is her priority. She set something public that signals to all mutual friends that she and him are talking. If she's actually aiming to be with you, that behavior is not consistent with that intent.
There is a point with some of this stuff where it sounds like, unless she was keeping her options open, she could just be with you now and take things slowly. But she's not. You shouldn't settle for second best.
Some of these comments are pretty single minded. Shit man, I wasn’t ready to marry when I was 24 years old. I popped the question last year when I was 32!
However…. My fiancé is 27 and doesn’t have PCOS.
While I can understand not being ready at your age, your girlfriend IS ready and has very valid reasons for wanting to take the next step. You haven’t ONLY been together 5 years man. 5 years is a long time! Unless you see yourself marrying this girl within the next 1-2 years, you need to let her go. It’s not anything you’ve done wrong, it’s simply the fact that yours and your girls goals don’t align. Sorry bro.
So a new friend, not one with history, is able to appear and become so close to you that you will love together. Seems like the perfect recipe for problems. You're very oblivious to the feelings of others. I'd end it with you if I were her.
My brother, either she’s more naive then a child and shouldn’t be in any relationship or she’s perfectly fine crossing a million boundaries and perfectly fine with some random mf openly disrespecting her fiancé.
Either way, it won’t be long until you’re posting about her cheating on you with you questioning how you never saw it coming.
Yes, I definitely want my children raised in a healthy and stable environment. I appreciate your insight. I guess it is selfish of me to bring a child into this world with him just because I want kids right now and I don’t want to wait any longer for someone better. No, Im not scared or leaving because I don’t think he would hurt me or anything. Im not sure if he cares enough about me to go out of his way to do something like that if I left. He’s told me he wants to have kids with me because he really wants kids and that way I’ll be stuck with him and he knows I’m financially stable enough to support our children even if he can’t. I just wish I hadn’t wasted this much time with him. I should’ve left when he went to jail but I felt partially responsible for it since I told the cops what happened, so I stayed to be loyal. I wish I had never even met him and fallen in love. I’m dreading ending it cuz I’m going to be so heartbroken and I don’t want to go through the process of getting over him.
Her coworkers are just jealous of you wanting to care for your wife. But, do you really want to give up your relationship over some petty other people. You need to speak with your wife and come up with a solution for both your feelings being hurt and your pride and her standing up to the people in her office that are making her uncomfortable with your relationship.
he is tired of not getting respect in his life and is about to rage. He storms away, yells “STOP MOVIGN MY SHIT” after ruffling some things around, goes out and punches his car and screams at the top of his lungs in his car
This would be enough to make me leave immediately
Punching a car over laundry? What's it gonna take for it to be your face?
I know a lot of people in long-term open relationships that work for them. If both partners agree to whatever the boundaries are and stick to them, that’s the key. When one violates the boundaries they’ve agreed upon together, not so much.
Anyway, you’re welcome to your opinion and judgement.
This is more like unwanted groping than oversexualization, which is a slippery slope regarding consent. Its really important that you set boundaries and hold them. If he cant handle that, its just the first of many boundaries he will push. Set your boundary by saying exactly what kind of behavior is and isnt acceptable and what will happen if he oversteps that boundary (ie removing yourself from proximity so that he cannot touch you). See what happens.
I felt hurt when you acted cold to me after I said I didn’t want to have sex. I’ve respected your boundaries when you haven’t wanted to and it is upsetting that you don’t respect mine in the same way.
Wow, how old is he? He IS NOT being “honest” with you. Far from it. He got you to plunk down some substantial cash so that you two could move in together. Something happened here, and I doubt it had anything to do with YOU. It's him.
Doesn't matter how long you've been together when someone shows you who the really are. Believe him & run in the other direction. How do you recover from this? YOU DON'T. Wow.
No no no, this is a contractual agreement & if you don't perform, you may be sued by the seller! WTF??? Does he not understand this?
So barring that scenario, let's say the seller let's you out of the contractual obligation and doesn't sue you both….okay, then he's being quite cavalier with YOUR MONEY. WTF is wrong with him?
And who the hell does something like this? I would sue him, I would sue him so very hot. What he did here is almost unforgiveable, and if you stick around after being screwed like this by him, get ready for more of his bullshit.
Get out while you still can.
Just updated the post lmao
Well you certainly proved him wrong. Just end it and let the poor dude move on with his life
Make it fun. Tell him to make a list of 5 items he'd want and Santa will choose one from taht list. This way it will still be kind of a surprise. Give him paper and pen and leave him to it.
this was pretty much my reaction as well. everyone in this story is toxic af. OP, stay broken up with him this time, block him and move on. disconnect yourself from this toxic mess otherwise you’re as bad as they are.
I don't want to. But if things get worse, I think so, because at this point we are just hurting each other. Maybe I'm too anxious of a person for a relationship right now. And we just aren't communicating where we understand each other. It's frustrating.
Most relationships come to end because someone appears on the scene. That could be u, pursue this if u think u two are genuinely better fit, nobody owns anyone, and you’re all still basically teenagers
Don’t go. Period.
You found all that and are still trying to salvage this “relationship”. Not only are you blind you’re in severe denial, I highly recommend you run actually sprint away from this immediately. Do not waste another day or thought on this guy.
This might blow up in your face, but the risk may be worth it if the alternative is being in a sexless marriage for the rest of your life. You got the go-ahead from your wife so go ahead.
Ok, without looking at your post history, here's my initial thought: whatever she helped you out with when you got married, should be the same (or a bit more) that you help her out with.
If it was going to be difficult to return this money, you shouldn't have accepted it (and spent it) in the first place. So try to come up with an equal sum so you can be even.
“She's not a pathological liar but, you list a whole bunch of examples that show she's a pathological liar. She doesn't need therapy, that's an excuse to keep playing the victim, instead of actually learning a lesson. Time for you to learn one too. This relationship is one huge mistake and by standing by this mistake you are only punishing yourself. All you are doing is giving the mistake more time to lie and manipulate the situation. If she loved or cared for anyone more than herself, she wouldn't be doing dangerous things that should and will get her deported. Enjoy your new cat and don't fall in love with human trash.
So it sounds like she has you on standby/backup while this other guy is her priority. She set something public that signals to all mutual friends that she and him are talking. If she's actually aiming to be with you, that behavior is not consistent with that intent.
There is a point with some of this stuff where it sounds like, unless she was keeping her options open, she could just be with you now and take things slowly. But she's not. You shouldn't settle for second best.
Some of these comments are pretty single minded. Shit man, I wasn’t ready to marry when I was 24 years old. I popped the question last year when I was 32!
However…. My fiancé is 27 and doesn’t have PCOS.
While I can understand not being ready at your age, your girlfriend IS ready and has very valid reasons for wanting to take the next step. You haven’t ONLY been together 5 years man. 5 years is a long time! Unless you see yourself marrying this girl within the next 1-2 years, you need to let her go. It’s not anything you’ve done wrong, it’s simply the fact that yours and your girls goals don’t align. Sorry bro.
OP clearly states that they have not paid out of pocket for any vet or dog food expenses.
So a new friend, not one with history, is able to appear and become so close to you that you will love together. Seems like the perfect recipe for problems. You're very oblivious to the feelings of others. I'd end it with you if I were her.
My brother, either she’s more naive then a child and shouldn’t be in any relationship or she’s perfectly fine crossing a million boundaries and perfectly fine with some random mf openly disrespecting her fiancé.
Either way, it won’t be long until you’re posting about her cheating on you with you questioning how you never saw it coming.
Get your ring back and move on.
Lol should’ve just scrolled and found your comment – mine was identical. Mind boggling that anyone would have unprotected sex with a sex worker.
Use the trip as a farewell to the relationship.
Go there, have a blast, try to find someone else, and if you do, dump your bf while there, if you don’t, then dump him when you get back.
Yes, I definitely want my children raised in a healthy and stable environment. I appreciate your insight. I guess it is selfish of me to bring a child into this world with him just because I want kids right now and I don’t want to wait any longer for someone better. No, Im not scared or leaving because I don’t think he would hurt me or anything. Im not sure if he cares enough about me to go out of his way to do something like that if I left. He’s told me he wants to have kids with me because he really wants kids and that way I’ll be stuck with him and he knows I’m financially stable enough to support our children even if he can’t. I just wish I hadn’t wasted this much time with him. I should’ve left when he went to jail but I felt partially responsible for it since I told the cops what happened, so I stayed to be loyal. I wish I had never even met him and fallen in love. I’m dreading ending it cuz I’m going to be so heartbroken and I don’t want to go through the process of getting over him.
Her coworkers are just jealous of you wanting to care for your wife. But, do you really want to give up your relationship over some petty other people. You need to speak with your wife and come up with a solution for both your feelings being hurt and your pride and her standing up to the people in her office that are making her uncomfortable with your relationship.
Did she recently start birth control?
That’s basically like saying “I dare you to retaliate, because I know you’d never do so.”
he is tired of not getting respect in his life and is about to rage. He storms away, yells “STOP MOVIGN MY SHIT” after ruffling some things around, goes out and punches his car and screams at the top of his lungs in his car
This would be enough to make me leave immediately
Punching a car over laundry? What's it gonna take for it to be your face?
I know a lot of people in long-term open relationships that work for them. If both partners agree to whatever the boundaries are and stick to them, that’s the key. When one violates the boundaries they’ve agreed upon together, not so much.
Anyway, you’re welcome to your opinion and judgement.
This is more like unwanted groping than oversexualization, which is a slippery slope regarding consent. Its really important that you set boundaries and hold them. If he cant handle that, its just the first of many boundaries he will push. Set your boundary by saying exactly what kind of behavior is and isnt acceptable and what will happen if he oversteps that boundary (ie removing yourself from proximity so that he cannot touch you). See what happens.
Talk to him about it.
I felt hurt when you acted cold to me after I said I didn’t want to have sex. I’ve respected your boundaries when you haven’t wanted to and it is upsetting that you don’t respect mine in the same way.