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I feel like I'm in the minority on this one but here we go. People saying that since she would sleep with a married man means that she would cheat are insane… Obviously what she did was morally wrong but she wasn't the one who made the vows. The man in that scenario is the one breaking the vows he made to his partner. Although that in no way indicates that she would cheat herself.
She slept with your friend before you guys got together. Sure she probably should have told you about it, but honestly that's a lot easier said than done. It's fine to be upset that she didn't tell you, I would be too, but either you forgive her and move on or break up with her. It's not fair to her to keep making her feel guilty over something that happened so long ago. If it's a dealbreaker for you that's fine, but end the relationship and move on.
There’s so much I don’t know. This culture is so locked away and old fashioned I haven’t even worked a day in my life. My main problem is leaving them, i have no idea how. Thank you for your words
what? you don't want to what because you might what? hurry the fuck up and expose that rapist. digital rape is still rape. fuck the advisory friend and fuck the other two friends. you've got brothers and cousins right? jesus you need to call the boys out on this one.
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There's millions of regular women who don't care about porn. No reason to be with control freaks who have issues with pictures on the Internet.
And you never knew he was a nasty booty picker with WORMS?! Byeeeee
You don’t want to marry her. Whatever timeline she gives you it won’t matter. One day, I bet it will feel right for you, with someone. But this doesn’t.
My husband always thought marriage wasn’t for him. Didn’t see the point. All that went out of the window when we met and we both love being married and didn’t hesitate. It’s just my experience, but maybe something to think over!
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Ew, I would be pissed too. You’re hung up on your ex and you’re disrespecting your current gf/relationship.
Thank you for the reply, I actually took a interest in psychology and have been studying it for years, never desired a career. I knew of NPD but never thought I could date a potential case.
Small price to pay for a small piece of heaven by the sounds of it. Get it done lol In the process of doing the same myself.
If my partner suddenly switched up like that i would seriously question if he's cheating. Because where does he get the idea after 3 years that condoms are so bothersome when there was never an issue before?
Ok in case this isn't a troll (wth kind of age gap is that??) … This is evidence that he WANTS to cheat and is actively looking to cheat. Is that ok to you?
How certain are you that they broke up? Can you get her number (from his phone if needed) and call her. Make sure she knows he broke up with her.
I understand how this happens, and you both sound good in your retelling of the tale, but it sounds like you both emotionally cheated on your partners, then he collected you as a side piece and his Ex doesn't know she is an ex.
Now, people have some control over their own thoughts but it is extremely difficult to blink someone else's eyes. You can't fix your 'bf', but maybe you can yourself (don't cheat, don't be an affair partner) . If his Ex thinks she is still his gf, and he is still going to see her, then you are the 'side piece', the 'affair partner'. If he will cheat on her today, he will cheat on you tomorrow…or today with her, depending on how you slice that cake.
She has adhd and depression. And I think a lot of learned behaviors from her parents who divorced and especially her dad who she lived with which is awful at communicating.
I get that she wants attention on her days off, but it just feels so draining, almost like not another person who wants to spend time with me but a puppy dog where it will bark if I leave the room. That’s a really bad example but it’s the best I can come up with
The last straw for me was last week when I asked if he wanted to grab some food because I was hungry. He said no because he had eaten already. If the tables were turned, I would have gone anyway because it's obvious that what he wanted was to spend some time together.
Dude, not to be harsh, but that’s crap. People aren’t mind readers. If you wanted his company, you should have asked for that, not ask him if he wants to grab food.
And if you’re the type to talk, then TALK. Don’t just expect him to know what you want. From what you describe, if he does want to repair the friendship, have you told him you want him to reach out more, so you feel you matter to him, or are you just expecting him to know that too. Rather than the relationship not being eirth it, this sounds more like you’re upset, youre exoecting him to repair the relationship in a certain way, and since he’s not, you’re assuming he dies that care, but no where dies it sound like you’ve actually told him what you want and need to repair the friendship. So before writing him off, if he has said he wants to repair it, figure out what you’d need for that to happen and tell him that. If after that he doesn’t want to do it, or agrees but doesn’t do it, THEN walk. Just don’t write him off until you at least tell him what you need, so he at least has knows how to fix it.
He's lying. You will receive emails from time to time about an inactive account. Actual tinder notifications are recommendations/responses/communications from an active tinder account.
So infer from that what you will. Lying about it though does infer quite a lot.
Some people are so terrified of being alone that they will accept anything
Some people feel that if you love someone, you can’t leave them
Well it’s easy to love human beings. Just because we love someone, doesn’t mean they are a good partner.
And some people can’t leave someone who has some good things about them. Even though they also have awful things about them.
But everyone has something good about them. You can find those good things in other people too. People that DO brush their teeth….
He sounds terrible, why are you dating him? Have you told him you don’t want to hear him ‘bragging’ about all the girls he’s masturbated to? I’m having a naked time wrapping my head around in what world it makes sense for him to share that with anyone, let alone his girlfriend.
There’s probably a bit of jealousy there, but it’s not unwarranted. She seems very manipulative and they have an inappropriate relationship that he doesn’t seem to realize yet.
The part that concerns me the most is her forcing her friendship on you, when you know it’s not genuine, it’s very concerning & manipulative.
I wouldn’t get much closer with this guy until he accepted that he would have to distance himself from her (no living together, no going to save her when she has other options, etc).
If everyone he has ever dated hated her, she is the common denominator & at some point he will have to acknowledge that
I have a heart condition too. What your BF is doing is causing you additional stress and it isn’t good for your condition.
For your own health, you should be with someone who doesn’t literally hurt you by causing you so much stress.
You made a very convincing argument for why you should leave. What’s stopping you?
This is tough because you are living there rent free. I would ask them that you want to help but want to go over their finances to ensure it doesn’t happen again. Why does it have to be in a day or so? You need more information.
I would want to see their bank statements and what they owe and figure out if this solves anything. Bankruptcy is an option and it isn’t always as bad as people think. Most of time it restructures debt to make it easier.
Also you have 3 other siblings are they all younger than you? Can they help?
I’m thinking he doesn’t want her to know he’s following… unless I’m misunderstanding you
I hope you find something workable for you, you deserve to feel secure if you go ahead with the pregnancy.
I got pregnant in your situation, and thankfully had a miscarriage or I would have had to abort because it just was not the right time. It was my dream to be a mom, but if you don't choose the right man to have kids with, or if the timing/finances are wrong, the level of stress and anxiety are tenfold. New/unsteady relationships can almost never handle the pressure ?? Make sure you're making the best choice for you ??
He is, but I'm not sure what to even say. And she hasn't like, tried to cheat with me even if its' gotten kinda close. I don't want to lose her as a friend either, but I have come to realize I'm not interested in a romatnic relationship with her
This is immature and cruel to the men they'll be leading on. When you're in a relationship, it's a little thrill to know someone else still wants you, but that comes from a stranger checking you out at a bar or something, not actively parading yourself around like you're single.
Just talk to him and tell him that you think he has a bit of a road rage problem and him getting distracted to that extent over a small slight made you feel unsafe and think he is a bad driver.
I don’t think you know how meetings and scheduling them works. You pick the best time and day for the task. What fucking difference does it make the day of the meeting. Wife will be pissed off regardless
Buy yourself a console for your games and tell him he doesn’t have the right to give away anything you bought but if he gives them away give him a bill for them.
“My fiancé gave back the ring after two years. There’s nothing official about her finding someone else, but my suspicions were aroused when she moved into our mutual friend’s apartment the same day.”
Pure poetry.
Her taking the number isn't really even the issue. She met a dude on the beach, took his number, then literally moments later while hanging out with her boyfriend, told him she wanted to go out alone with this guy for coffee etc. Then when the boyfriend objected, she tried to guilt him by making him seem like he is a jealous boyfriend.
Who is going to cause ripples in their relationship to hangout alone with a stranger they met literally minutes ago?
No, they started DATING when she was 19 or so (and he was 36/37). They may have met even before that. I just . . . there is no world in which this particular age gap can be overlooked. He's uncomfortable because she was a literal TEENAGER and he was MIDDLE-AGED when their romantic/sexual relationship began, and he sure as hell hasn't gotten any younger. No wonder he questions her attraction to him and feels like she must be mocking him. It's probably one of the only signs that he has any remorse or self-awareness of how inappropriate what he did is . . . the fact that some part of his subconscious is nagging him that there's no rational reason why she SHOULD be attracted to him.
Six and a half years and you’re trying to rationalize this to yourself? Be so astronomically fr right now
If it’s YOUR idea to try for a baby and he agrees, you get pregnant but have second thoughts, does he get a say in whether or not you get an abortion?
Don’t say it’s different. Both are life and relationship altering decisions that involve potential consequences to your own bodies.
I just don’t get why say yes to both the viewing and then the funeral when she couldn’t make the viewing and then make excuses for both.
She is the only person who can explain her actions and choices to you, if you ask her to. Maybe you should put her on the mental list of “good-time friends” and not “actually need support” friends.