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I don't think you should cross that bridge until you get to it, and family is hugely important. You really want to do everything you can to avoid a break with your family.
But you should consider that by not accepting your husband, the reality of it is that your mom doesn't respect you or your choices. By being disrespectful of him, she is disrespectful of you.
If it comes to that, you might want to tell her that.
This is extremely messed up. Why in the world would a boss be someone’s beneficiary? He does understand the implications of this right? She gets everything. Why would a boss of 40 and a very young man have a relationship like this? Start asking questions and be very careful to listen to how he responds. None of this is normal and his excuse is absurd as to why it’s not you.
Proceed? Divorce is how you proceed. He tells you he is going to do something that is against the usual rules of marriage and you have told him you don't give him permission either. Therefore he's breaking his marriage vows – its only a matter of time – and disrespecting you. There is nothing left but divorce.
I hope you learned that life isn’t a hallmark movie and that if you want something you have to say it. You acted like a naive fool and a coward when you spent years not acting on your feelings. You were also a terrible friend to E. it’s time to grow up. Apologise to your friend, leave the job, and go to therapy, in that order. You’ve proven you’re not mature enough to handle yourself in an adult situation. Least you can do is admit it and own it.
At a bar sure, specifically dive bars that keep the music kind of low and have cheap drinks. Not at a club, 99.99999% of guys are there for the meat market.
The point her though is that she said she couldn't and as soon as it was someone she was uncomfortable with helping then “magically” she could have helped. This reeks of a self centered way of operating that someone will only help because they feel uncomfortable that someone they dont like will help rather than to be there for their partner. It's a very fair assessment and she admitted it
Nope. But what if she places down a boundary so that he doesn’t watch porn. He’s not being deprived of anything.
If mens needs are that they are shitty people then that’s their fault but their partner shouldn’t have to deal with their addictions. Idk why you are trying ti make all men look like shitty horny raging people. You just make it seem like they can’t control themselves.
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Tbh, OP almost certainly looks 30. With the exception of a few very hot drug addicts, every 30+ year old I have talked to about this or heard others gossip about have had people respond in genuine shock to their age because “she looks so much younger.” At some point that’s too many people that “look young for their age” and it’s actually just what the age generally looks like. As a society we don’t know/refuse to acknowledge what 30 year olds actually look like. I am rapidly nearing my late twenties (and never had a “youthful” looking disposition) and still regularly get hit on my older men who end up shocked and unhappy that am old enough to drink and have a bachelors degree.
Women in their 30s are still by and large young and very hot, and without any obvious age markers, most of these dudes that buy into concepts like “the wall” will hit on them until they learn their actual age.
These comments are wild. Legally be has done nothing wrong. He's under no obligation to delete the pictures. As long as he does not share them, they are legally his. Lying to the police to get him to delete the photos will only end badly for you. People suggesting telling his mom or the police are crazy because neither of these options will get you anywhere. His mom can't force him to delete them and he obtained the photos legally so the police can't do anything.
You can try to use him but you'd lose in an instant. These cases have already been before the court before and they always rule that you can't force someone to delete the pictures if they've done nothing wrong.
You need therapy or counselling and to just move on.
It has, I’m so sorry y’all have to go through this, and I’m thankful to have been more enlighten on the situation. It seems I was being a bit inconsiderate and naive
Just want to add this to what everyone else already rightly stated: your child WILL go through either chubby or skinny phases, definitely insecure and difficult phases in their young life and will most likely consider therapy at some point (like any normal person). Your wife WILL make all of this worse with her principles, worsen your child's complexes and even give them new ones. This is something you therefore need to address as a threat to your unborn child as well and not just for your mother. Your wife isn't “concerned”, she's deeply fatphobic and also doesn't seem to believe in therapy, both of which are huge red flags for a future mom.
Okay. But my point is that you take the time to ask him this. He doesn’t do the same to you.
It seems as you both are stuck in your ways. Perhaps call a truce, she stops all criticizing and you stop deferring every decision. Make a pact that you can both do this, one choice at a time, together. I wish you great luck on making things work!
“She will think about it?” That's a sign. Let her go.
Whats plan B if he gladly obliged?
There's a rational sensible solution.
Both read: Not Just Friends by Dr Shirley Glass
She is recognized as the expert on managing friendships.
It's based on research (not just opinion) of couples that experienced infidelity with 'just a friend'. It's fine to have friends but the relationship has to be appropriately managed.
Lessons learned, including what activities and topics to share with friends.
The book and the facts will enable you both to intelligently discuss boundaries that work for both of you.
IMO your GF will change her extreme sweeping position.
Can you both online on your salary for awhile and put all her earnings toward her debt? It would still take five-ish years to pay it off but if you really love each other and are willing to make the sacrifice then it might be worth it.
You ain’t being ridiculous. He was getting his ego massaged in front of your eyes. Start flirting with guys in front of him when he switches you say about swapping numbers with a middle aged slag bag
Ride the wave and enjoy it whilst smashing your dreams!! If you’re meant to have both, you will!
I mean everyone here is just gonna ignore the edit. When you buy snacks and groceries she eats them so your logic tracks that you should be able to do the same. She is either childish and a hypocrite or your leaving something out.
My first question and biggest concern is where are these photos coming from? They’re not being shared by the women themselves into the group chat… so are these adult men sharing very hot photos that are sent to them in confidence with other people/men in a group chat????
You cant figure out where on the internet people would get pictures of very hot girls to show each other on the internet? This thread is wild.
Your fiancé is the one that should speak with her.
Prior to marriage, sure. Let the fiancé handle this. As a spouse, you have full authority to defend your family at all times. A married couple should be a unified front and either one can speak for the family.
Where.and how did you find this guy. Well despite his insecurities and low self esteem he managed to bagged a 26yo, imagine that.
Well good luck in being his mama.
well theres a good way to lose a lot of weight within a few minutes… dump his ass
Recently talked to her after the advice everyone has been giving me on communication and she says that it’s just been happening way too often and she’s starting to feel used. I told her I finally understand and I feel a lot better myself. At first I thought it was because she didn’t find me attractive anymore but now I know that’s not the case. I guess I was just afraid when she said mental health that she wasn’t really liking our relationship anymore. Thanks for all the feedback guys!
What even is the mentality here? I have a girlfriend yet I wanna make it seem like I don’t care about her… what? Is this what really goes on in the heads of little boys? Why does that make you cool? Why do you hang out with people that think it’s cool for you to not have genuine feelings for someone? Why are you insecure around how your friends perceive you and your interactions with women when you literally already have a girlfriend? Is that not you winning?? Wtf did I just read fr
So firstly I think you need to put this into perspective for yourself. You don't actually online that far away. It's 24 (at a minimum) hours by plane for us. You might want to look into transport options that are faster because w couple of hours by plane or whatever is basically nothing.
The second thing you need to do is ask where your daughter's behaviour is actually coming from. Our children never did this despite being old enough to remember their home country. I've never heard of children behaving like this over grandparents living in a different country actually. I suspect that your daughters behaviour is actually stemming more from yours than an internal struggle she may be feeling, for her being away from her grandparents should just be normal. I would suggest seeking some therapy both for yourself and your daughter. You absolutely must abstain from expressing your own feelings on the matter to your daughter from now on, that's absolutely not ok, most people would call that emotional abuse.
If if he had apologized, you're under no obligations. Even if he paid all he owes and more, you're under no obligations.
Umm… have you been tested for ureaplasma?
If you do check for it and if you have it, have a chat with your boyfriend because it often happens that infected men give it to women.
no, please keep going!!! i want to have a ton of different options i can bring up to him so we can decide which way will be the most comfortable and fun way for us to experiment