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You leave. And make a plan before you go. My ex did this too. Started out as arguing, jealousy, then yelling, then throwing things.
Then throwing things near me. Then hitting the wall near me. Once I “fell” down the stairs. After that I left.
A year later I got a call from the police, asking me about our former relationship. I told them about the abuse and asked why they were calling. “Oh”, she said. “He’s been arrested for the murder of his girlfriend.”
You think it won’t happen to you. You’re wrong. You need to leave and tell people you love right away. You are in danger.
I don’t normally “entertain sexual thoughts” the feeling is more like “This is someone I would want to spend the rest of my life with.” They are very enjoyable to be around and just make me happier.
He’s immature and petty.
Yea, no dude, this is a very hot line in the sand. The whole she “still wants to hang out with him and b) wants me to hang out with him too, “with other friends around…” thing is a miserable situation. That is hella gross and I'd distance myself as far as possible from it. If she's not willing to draw the line in the sand, and point to it, with glowing red reticles, that is hella sus. If someone told my girl that, she would shut it down, as would I about her. A relationship built on 2 people are about 2 people, not some wayward 3rd. I understand that work relationships are tricky, but they're a lot less tricky when boundaries are set, full stop. If she isn't willing to set boundaries with some rando from work, what's next?
Some people take a beautiful girl And hide her away from the rest o' the world I wanna be the one to walk in the sun Oh girls, they wanna have fun
You need to get yourself and your wife in full agreement on this, so that you have a united front in dealing with her parents. Ask your wife if she thinks that the child will be of less value because it is half black. Once she accepts that the baby will have just the same value as a pure “chinese” child, you get her to agree that as soon as her parents do or say anything that in any way demeans or devalues the child, you will cut contact with them.
This is a tough situation, but it's not impossible. Get your wife to accept the fundamental value of the child, irrespective of the colour of its skin, and you will be able to resolve this. Good luck!
She didn't talk about the children and being a mom?
If she wants a place on her own then she should get a place on her own and not bother you. Date 6 months to get to know her before making any stupid decisions that could traumatize you for the rest of your life
He lied!
You have to decide if you are willing to be married to a liar.
That’s called having a child not a BF.
Fuck if I ever dated a woman who actually would pay half of rent I’d cry. Last relationship I had to work 3 jobs to pay rent my car payment and pay for her food and alcohol all the time.
Your bf is a loser sorry to say- 27 yr old man getting high playing video games and not even paying for his own food is just the epitome of sad sack of shit.
U shud challenge her to a deadlift contest
Some people really believe that you can just ask ANY question under the expectation that if it is denied, there should and will be no ramifications.
Invite her over for supper with her SO.
Then in an upbeat way summarize how much one on one time they spend together (including texts) and then thank her for helping him with his emotional and marriage.
Suggest that she act as a therapist for both of you.
Keep it light so everyone can laugh it off during dinner – but the SO will be alerted and the woman should be warned off.
As a man like you, I would like to respectfully say that you should grow a pair of balls and either demand changes in the relationship or leave.
Stop being a pushover and take charge of your own relationship.
Most normal game on Patrion ?
But he has said he will fight me tooth and nail and will seek full custody just to spite me.
Call and talk with a lawyer, they will give you the best advice of all you can do for you and your daughter. If you have documentation of him saying that, keep hold of it. Regardless mention that to the lawyer.
You can call your state bar and get a referral for an hour consultation that is discounted. It can help you make a plan of what you need to do.
I’m just a kid myself.
Well..technically you aren't…. and you made the very adult choice to be with someone with kids that's older.
Clearly this was more of a relaxed relationship for you. In the future, avoid this I'd by making sure you and the other are on the same page and agree that if it changes you'll let the other know.
Tell her now so she doesn't waste any more time with someone who doesn't feel the same as she does.
Yes, we have discussed it at length but want to make sure we are making the right decision as right now we are just not telling them. Outside of the group all of our friends know.
I'm sorry. I'm confused. Does she have autism?
You have two options here.
Tell him your boundaries stand firm and if someone else can cause him to want to end things, he was never invested in the relationship himself. He will either respect your boundaries or leave.
You leave him. Tell him you won't come second in a relationship to anyone.
He is calling you controlling to make you feel like a normal boundary is crazy. That's manipulative and cruel to someone you supposedly love. He is 7 years older than you pining after a woman who is in a relationship. He finds it funny he makes her current bf uncomfortable. That doesn't seem like a red flag to you? Him taunting another man with his “friendship” with his gf seems like a red flag to me. You deserve better than a man who wants for something else.
A month is nowhere long enough to really change. Just leave things as they are.
I sense some strong confusion over what “old fashioned” means.
No. This is not normal. It’s domestic abuse. Get out while you can.
I care more about the many more children who watch their father abuse their mothers. I care more about the children whose fathers have abandoned them and do not support them and are doomed to live! a life of poverty. Why do I care so much more about these children?
Because these children outnumber the ones who find out their dad was not their “real” dad was by a wide margin.
No, that’s called a circle of abuse. People who have been in an abusive relationship are more likely to get into another one in the future.
This is your first relationship…
Do not let this define relationships for you. Its very toxic.
If you have ask your BF for permission to do things that are within reason, you're in a bad relationship.
The idea that he would have an issue with you spending the night for a girls sleep over, is absurd.
Stick to the no contact and move on. Go enjoy yourself in San Deigo and do not let a boyfriend dictate your personal choices.
Its been 4 years, nothing will change. Its the same pattern. He hurts you, says he will do better, does better for 5 mins, goes right back to hurting you.
Its time to let go and be strong with your no contact. Block on everything. Don't give him access to contact you.
Once you experience a healthy relationship elsewhere, you will look back and wonder why the hell you stuck around for so long. It will be a night and day difference.
Alcohol brings out the truth in people. Dave and Daisy are NOT good for you and Steven.