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My summer school biology teacher said you should always have a pair and a spare. He… wasn't a good role model.
Given you see your b/f in the best light it sounds like he is a bit of an arsehole. Arrogant and challenging (is that disagreeing strongly with) your parents? I don't know that I'd like him either.
Sounds like you're trapped between a rock and a nude place. There is not simple solution. How about you minimise the amount of exposure your family has to him and work towards moving out? You say they have you finacially cornered? You're 23yo, don't you have a job?
My best friend us in a marriage like this… it happened after they got married.. this is happening before house buying and marriage.. I would have been out if this a long time before.. because it doesn't get better she is not going to change.. 7 yrs and you can't see this pattern and then you cheat on her… umm you know what to do.. I don't understand why you are continuing this relationship..
My mother specifically asked for her to come because she’s been trying to form a relationship with her for a while since we plan on getting married. My gf has never really given a reason why but she seems to avoid my mother like she’s a leper. It’s easy for her now since we live! across the country. She didn’t have to show interest, just be present for a one hour ceremony. Kinda like going to see your children’s music recital, you don’t necessarily have to go, but you’re a dick if you don’t.
Martial arts isn't even part of the equation. You have an abusive wife and should leave. Nobody should have to make an effort to learn how to defend themselves from their significant other.
Nope. I would drop these fake friends and block them everywhere and enjoy your life without them. She was never your friend and there’s a decent chance that they cheated before your break up. Good riddance to bad rubbish!
Unfortunately I think this problem is above your paygrade. Your girlfriend needs a mental health evaluation and you can't force her to have it, you can only suggest her and you decide for how long you will wait until she wants to fix her own mental health. Do not stay forever or wait forever if she doesn't want to heal. I can't armchair diagnose her but she seems to be suffering from a mental health condition because her behavior is not normal, we humans and in fact all living creatures need to sleep, something is wrong with her if she doesn't sleep every single day for a healthy amount of time. It doesn't really have to be 8 hours for every person, some people function well with 6 or 7 hours, but she should be sleeping at least that, and you should too (the amount of time that works for you)
Being upset is understandable.
But at this point there is nothing to be gained by confronting him. He already knows what he did. It’s not going to be news to him. And you being upset at him isn’t going to impact him really.
You already did the only thing that really matters. You broke up with him.
Now, feel your feelings, process then, and try to move on.
As they say, living a good life is the best revenge.
I can tell this is a fresh wound. You are angry and want someone to pay for your pain – and rightfully so!!!
However, beating the crap out of him will solve nothing, and she will NOT come back to you.
As you said, they are both cheaters.
I believe in karma. It may take years and years but karma always gets you. What you put out there comes back three fold. It may take years, but it truly happens.
My best advice, don't look back. Take these experiences as learning.
Don't let the pain and bitterness eat away at you. It will destroy you.
I wish you nothing but finding peace ✌️ and happiness.
Not a single suggestion has been posted with “Leave now” advice.
promise I’m not a shitty fiancé lol. I was bored and I get anxious whenever he flies so I was entertaining/distracting myself. But also, def check out the YouTube clips of nathan for you. He’s pretty awesome
We just broke up for good.
Tell him you will pay half the bills assuming you can afford it but any maintenance and repairs need to be done at his expense since he is the home owner. Keep your receipts etc so you can have proof you have been paying him rent in case he acts funny later in the relationship or once you do get married you will be legally entitled to half of it anyway.
I more so meant right person as far as long term vs hookup.
No
You sound like a kind person. You are so young. Don’t spend your life like this. You aren’t happy. It seems like almost every minute of every day is spent trying to figure out how to please him or not make him mad. Please leave him and block him, and go live! your free 23-year-old life. You will feel so much better, and you can find someone as sweet as you.
Well if you are unable to see each other three times per week (which is what you want) without arguing, maybe you aint a good fit?
Also, he doesnt really know how to handle it, cause he was the one proposing to make it 2 instead if 3, was he?
What has ur mental illness got to do with the amount of seeing someone?
Dump him sis!
Girl, this is Abuser 101. Start off charming and dominant, belittle, pressure, manipulate, blame, threaten. This is how it starts & escalates. You need to work on your self-esteem. Why did you put up with this mistreatment for so long?!?
Why did you censor the word abortion?
Maybe it’s cause I’m autistic and have ADHD, but when someone tells me something about them i that’s seems important like their favorite color or food , or seven something I notice I try to make a note of it . Usually in the notes sections of their page of my phone contacts
Get some hobbies and some passions. Join some groups on meetup, cultivate yourself into an interesting person who has other stuff going on.
Was it a dude or a girl?
And the OP still works on top of childcare and is overextended. I would pay childcare for the 3 years left and save the sanity.
Yeah, I just mentioned in another comment that we actually do want to have a kid one day. And that's what scares me, I cannot imagine taking care of kids and having to help an adult with a disability without any kind of permanent assistance.
You cannot keep her in your life. Right now, you are friends with benefits. She wants a monogamous relationship, you wait to either add other people or remove the benefits. Even if she agrees to just being friends, she will feel worse thah she would just being dumped. Go no contact for at least a few months if you're going to try the friend thing.
Her family can handle the self harm if it happens and gets severe, though maybe I'd give them a heads up. SH is a long and difficult battle for a lot of people. You'd be causing negative emotions, nothing else. The SH is her response to very negative emotions and you aren't responsible for her coping mechanisms. If her response was going on a shopping spree every time she felt really shitty, you probably wouldn't be posting “I'm worried she might buy some stuff she can't afford if I do this” even though that is objectively self destructive behavior. Not your problem.