So what you said above, I was going to say your family are assholes. But after providing more information about Charlie in the comments, he is a major asshole and your family are 100% correct. It's no wonder they don't like him. Seriously, leave and repair the relationship with your family.
Does he understand that “winning the court” means he'd have to care about his kids actually? Highly doubt he wants anything more than pretend to be a father of the year for his wedding. In that case, suggest a weekends together, now, not only for a wedding. I guess he loses interest pretty quickly.
This. Please do not beat yourself up or worry that she still loves him. She doesn't.
I dated someone for 9 years who didn't want to marry me. I got a ring eventually but then he showed no interest in taking it further, cut a long story short we went our separate ways.
If I watched that person meet someone and get married in less than a year, I would feel extra sour over the way I wasted my twenties on somebody that wasn't sure about me. I'd feel like I was not good enough to be married to. My self esteem would be taking a hit.
Your other half is probably feeling resentful and like she was not enough after 9 years, I think that would hurt anybody's self esteem whether they are over the person or not.
Thinking that you can be friends with your ex a few months after a breakup is insane. I don't know the reason for you two breaking up, but he was in love with you and that feeling is like an addiction that takes time to heal and you don't let him do that. Is it his fault too for maintaining contact with you when he needs time apart from you to get over it.
On top of that, you introduce a new boyfriend to him letting him know that you are over it when he is in a bad spot mentally. You have the right to be with others i'm not denying that, but right now what he needs is to take time apart from you. You can't force him to be friends, if you want to be friends in the future maybe it will go great, but each person heals differently, and right now is not the moment.
Isn’t my concern that she’s acting unpredictable (or unstable) worthy of attention? Do my needs not matter as a partner? My need to be with someone that acts consistent and doesn’t randomly wake up and buy a dog because they happened to scroll through Facebook?
I don’t want to break up with him I was just angry. He texted me asking if I was calling him a rapist. I don’t want to use the word rape because other women have gone through worst and I don’t feel traumatized or anything.
1) break up with him.
2) call him a rapist. because he raped you. that's what rapists do.
3) you are having a trauma response, to a traumatic event. you are experiencing trauma.
​
Somebody you loved and trusted, violated you in the grossest, most violent, way possible. What could have been a wonderful moment between you, was stolen, from you, by him. He choked you, restrained you, put himslef inside of you, against your will, against your consent. you were raped. Tell somebody. Immediately.
Ask him: what if while we are gone, the family he is staying with has a family emergency? Who will be there to get ur child? Also, this is literally her first sleepover, she could decide part way through that she wants to go home, that has happened even with cousins in my family. U don't know what will happen or if ur child will be ok. What if the parents begin to argue in front of ur kid and makes her uncomfortable (or any other million and one things that could go on at a strangers house) and she calls u to take her home, but u are states away. U are correct, it is unsafe. U said u are her parent, I'm assuming u legally adopted her? She is ur child in that case. And ur partner should not treat u that way, it almost sounds like he is trying to make a point to u that ur voice does not matter. That is pretty harsh. I hope u do stand ur ground, or if she goes, u stay home and tell ur husband he can go without u because someone needs to stay incase something goes wrong or ur daughter just wants to come home.
You are 19 this is not a healthy relationship you call it quits now can get some therapy to help you stop picking abusive guys. You are young and can learn to make better choices.
I hope this comment has helped you 🙂
Ask her to go for walks or picnics with you, after a few timesit will be much easier to ask her to be your girlfriend.
What do you see in this dude?
So what you said above, I was going to say your family are assholes. But after providing more information about Charlie in the comments, he is a major asshole and your family are 100% correct. It's no wonder they don't like him. Seriously, leave and repair the relationship with your family.
Does he understand that “winning the court” means he'd have to care about his kids actually? Highly doubt he wants anything more than pretend to be a father of the year for his wedding. In that case, suggest a weekends together, now, not only for a wedding. I guess he loses interest pretty quickly.
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Nude to know for sure . Good point
Well dude, try to have a convo about it with her.
This. Please do not beat yourself up or worry that she still loves him. She doesn't.
I dated someone for 9 years who didn't want to marry me. I got a ring eventually but then he showed no interest in taking it further, cut a long story short we went our separate ways.
If I watched that person meet someone and get married in less than a year, I would feel extra sour over the way I wasted my twenties on somebody that wasn't sure about me. I'd feel like I was not good enough to be married to. My self esteem would be taking a hit.
Your other half is probably feeling resentful and like she was not enough after 9 years, I think that would hurt anybody's self esteem whether they are over the person or not.
Oh no what an idiot for having the integrity to choose the truth over easy white trash pussy.
Thinking that you can be friends with your ex a few months after a breakup is insane. I don't know the reason for you two breaking up, but he was in love with you and that feeling is like an addiction that takes time to heal and you don't let him do that. Is it his fault too for maintaining contact with you when he needs time apart from you to get over it.
On top of that, you introduce a new boyfriend to him letting him know that you are over it when he is in a bad spot mentally. You have the right to be with others i'm not denying that, but right now what he needs is to take time apart from you. You can't force him to be friends, if you want to be friends in the future maybe it will go great, but each person heals differently, and right now is not the moment.
Isn’t my concern that she’s acting unpredictable (or unstable) worthy of attention? Do my needs not matter as a partner? My need to be with someone that acts consistent and doesn’t randomly wake up and buy a dog because they happened to scroll through Facebook?
I don’t want to break up with him I was just angry. He texted me asking if I was calling him a rapist. I don’t want to use the word rape because other women have gone through worst and I don’t feel traumatized or anything.
1) break up with him.
2) call him a rapist. because he raped you. that's what rapists do.
3) you are having a trauma response, to a traumatic event. you are experiencing trauma.
​
Somebody you loved and trusted, violated you in the grossest, most violent, way possible. What could have been a wonderful moment between you, was stolen, from you, by him. He choked you, restrained you, put himslef inside of you, against your will, against your consent. you were raped. Tell somebody. Immediately.
Ask him: what if while we are gone, the family he is staying with has a family emergency? Who will be there to get ur child? Also, this is literally her first sleepover, she could decide part way through that she wants to go home, that has happened even with cousins in my family. U don't know what will happen or if ur child will be ok. What if the parents begin to argue in front of ur kid and makes her uncomfortable (or any other million and one things that could go on at a strangers house) and she calls u to take her home, but u are states away. U are correct, it is unsafe. U said u are her parent, I'm assuming u legally adopted her? She is ur child in that case. And ur partner should not treat u that way, it almost sounds like he is trying to make a point to u that ur voice does not matter. That is pretty harsh. I hope u do stand ur ground, or if she goes, u stay home and tell ur husband he can go without u because someone needs to stay incase something goes wrong or ur daughter just wants to come home.
How do you approach it? You end it.
You are 19 this is not a healthy relationship you call it quits now can get some therapy to help you stop picking abusive guys. You are young and can learn to make better choices.
From where I live, its summer all year round. The schooling term has also just started, so its long, long way until any sort of holiday