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Birth Date: 1998-10-09
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Stop having breaks if you don't actually want a fucking break. You're either together or not. There's no in between. You gotta deal with your feelings
I have been. It’s not like i contact him. But he is viewing my stories every day, more than my mom or best friend.. so why must i just “live with it” if he is still creeping my page?
You sound like you have a serious savior complex. Your line about how everything you do for your gf is ‘soul breaking’ pushed it into martyr territory. You are nice about her triggers, introduced her to your family, talk to her daily and encourage her. HTF is that ‘soul breaking?’ Ffs.
It sounds like you treat her like a project and jump in and do everything, even stuff she hasn’t asked you to do. You curtail her developing emotional resilience, self reliance, and self confidence. Then you hold it over her head that it’s ‘soul breaking’ to do this stuff it’s not even clear she wants or asked for.
Bob may actually do more for her by listening and encouraging her to be independent. Long term, that’s better for her mental health than someone who does everything. Or, he may not do much for her, but she’s frustrated and feels smothered and undermined by all your ‘help.’
I suggest you seek therapy to understand why you have a savior complex. This isn’t healthy for either of you.
Right, and that’s something I didn’t even think about. I have no idea how this behavior might develop with time or changing circumstances.
And yeah, I honestly was close to breaking up with him over the ledger but he was adamant it wouldn’t be an issue going into the future, and to his credit it really hasn’t. It makes me worry that he’s changing his behavior to keep me around, but i don’t know if this stuff will resurface 2, 10, 20 years down the road when he’s more comfortable to be himself.
My friends and I call him out on it whenever he does it. He takes it fine and laughs it off like a big joke. But the joke is getting less funny as time goes on :/
Your advice is very relieving, thank you for your help
She has issues and needs therapy, not you watching porn in secret, because that is literally her biggest fear. Lying is a terrible thing to do in response to her issues.
This marriage should be over.
You're not overthinking it. He's hung up on her. You're right, you deserve someone who's all the way in with you. Walk away.
i don’t think minecraft has proximity chat, but you’re right about everything else
So, you know this about her side:
The only times she reached out were to ask if she’s making the right choice ending things now and that she missed me and this is so naked.
And you have this on your side:
I tried to fight for the relationship whenever we were deciding if we should break.
I do truly love her and overall the relationship wasn’t toxic at all.
It sounds like there is some regret both ways and potential to work things out.
If that is what you want (working things out)… does it really matter who makes the first move to reconnect?
Just get out there and present the idea. Both of you could be sitting around waiting for the other person to reach out. Enough time apart, eventually someone is going to accept this is done for good. By then the door is closed and congrats, you two missed the boat.
Don't worry about who needs to reach out first to put it into motion. Just go do it if its what you want.
I agree this is not about the money. This is about your parents financially, mentally, and physically abandoning you. You grew up an emotional orphan. You have the right to be hurt and angry. When your parents “gave” you money or “helped” you out, they were actually paying you for the gap in minimum wage they missed from the time you were 12. Sh*t, they probably owe you more!
The trauma from being emotionally orphaned does not just go away. It takes therapy and having the chance to be honest about what actually happened. They may not want to hear it, and you may not want to say it to them, but you deserve to be able to voice it to someone. If not a therapist, then at least a trusted confidant to start. The longer it gets held in, the harder it erupts.
You feel this way because out of all the people he couldn’t slept with. It was the one person who’s mean to you & tried to sabotage your relationship! Break up & move on! You won’t get pass this & it’ll on-line in your head rent free!
Yes, but much worse.
Actually, OP has clarified that her ovaries weren't removed, only her uterus. Her lack of sex drive would not be a normal result of this procedure and she should definitely be talking with her doctor about it.
Exactly!! He doesn't deserve any part of you. You deserve much better and you're going be be great while he's going to be all alone and feeling like the dumbass he is very soon
We just had our last session like a week ago. I didn't want to quit, he did.
“Fuck you mom, I'm a grown man, I have hairy balls, I think I have the right to party without you knowing.”
Apologize for trash talking about your husband. I assume it was pretty heavy Since she told your husband immediately.
Keep us updated on what happens this weekend OP.
Good luck
You got scared to tell your partner you passed out from the heat?!?!
You are not in a good relationship. They are controlling, or wanting to control, every aspect of your life, and gaslighting you on the way making you feel like it WAS your fault.
It's never your fault. Please leave him.
Correction…yout BF is worried he is ugly…and is feeling insecure about his own looks.
Yeah no i cant lately i get knots in my stomach and difficulty breathing when im out and im about to go home or shes coming back from somewhere