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Yes, violence is a massive red flag, even if it’s directed at things at the moment. Get out while you can.
This isn’t “slamming a door while walking away from a fight“ kind of violence. It’s “actively choosing to destroy valuable possessions of a person who very reasonably denied her a favour and told her why“ kind of violence.
Don't mess with video game girlfriends.
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You can't do much about his behaviour but you can leave your boyfriend and be in a relationship with a “baby daddy” (the friend)!
You tell her that you are very uncomfortable with her messaging other men(even strangers) and ask her to stop. If she refuses, you break up with her on the spot.
She doesn't respect you, and obviously, you value the relationship way more than she does. The trust is gone, and you can only create so many excuses for her before even yourself are able to open your eyes and see reality.
The good thing, at least, is that you didn't rush marriage as so many people do this while in the honeymoon period, aka first 6-18 months of any new relationship.
If she starts arguing with you, pinning the blame on you, it's very easy to turn the situation around. Say you could never imagine yourself sending sexy messages to random women as it's an obvious form of cheating and that you wouldn't want to hurt her.
Tldr: she is emotionally cheating on you at a minimum and deep down knows that this isn't normal relationship behaviour for a serious relationship with marriage in mind. Tell her to stop, break up if she doesn't, or accept that you have an open relationship at best
*she
Shes 21 bro. She not gonna listen to you. Just stop replying if its about any guys
This is the biggest red flag!!!! I'm not one who usually tells people to cut their losses and run, but my stomach hurts just reading that. That is absolutely NOT something to joke about, and the fact that he has said or done other things that made you uncomfortable is very telling. Please, please listen to your instincts.
I spent 20+ years feeling trapped in a miserable marriage that I should have ended after a few years. Don't be like me, and waste your best years with someone who doesn't treat you the way you deserve to be treated and who doesn't cherish what he's got. Please, do not marry this man. I worry for you.
Oof… that is a hard sell dude. A hard journey to navigate for 6 years.
I hope there wasn't confusion on this statement:
The distance does make a significant difference.
Considering this reaction:
What about distance could make it work out?
What I meant, given your current circumstances. There will be a higher chance for successful relationship if you had someone in your home town.
Your schedule is already complicated, and having your partner accessible and feel present in your day to day. Makes a significant difference for it to succeed.
This woman, is one of many people you will be compatible with.
She claims to be a diagnosed with it, But she's never been to a doctor and I'm afraid she just self-diagnosed after identifying some stuff she was on tik-tok.
This relationship is clearly transactional. If you want to stay with her, you have to pay for it. If you don't want to pay, or if you can't afford it, leave. She's a model using her cards she was dealt to get what she likes. You don't have to play that game if you don't want to. ??♀️
I'd just send a message saying you can't afford the trip, or the things she wants, and you want to end the relationship. Then cancel the bookings and block. That way, neither of you waste each other's time.
So the cherry on top of this sundae is that he's openly racist?!?!
Sounds like a man who was almost 10years older did this to you and your mad about it? Or maybe your man left you for someone who is 10years younger to him?
Either way, get therapy love❤️