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There are so many friends of mine that have seen me hot, let alone the girls at the gym. It’s just one of those things. OP, your partner is an insane prude.
based on a lot of posts on this sub: yes, men often feel threatened/insecure by vibrators lmao. the degree ranges but generally yea. you should have an open conversation with ur guy about it so he can understand why its normal and even good for both of you
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For crying out loud it's not a dental hygiene thing
Dude everything in your post indicates that you are the problem here. You didn't mention any actual evidence of cheating, just your personal speculation from her going out (like young people do) and texting friends. And with her being 18 when you were 26 at the start of your relationship, you look super creepy here, and obviously not just to me.
Are you even positive he's overseas? Have you seen proof?
What makes you think he's doing it on purpose? We both have ADHD and he can be a little socially unaware so that's what made me think that it wasn't being done on purpose.
Ditto marries 12 years in March and my husband has never made cruel remarks when I gained wait after pregnancy. She's self conscious enough with her weight gain. Her hubby is straight up POS and AH for commenting the way he did.
She for the streets bro, that insane, bro just cuz she's had father issues and past traumas that doesn't mean she gets to treat you terribly and be emotionally abusive. Clearly she has tons of issues SHE needs to work with NOT you, guarantee you if it was the other way around do you think she'd support you like you are her? Guarantee you on everything she wouldn't, you woulda Been dumped long ago. She may be a good person with friends and people but not good at relationships and how to treat a man G. You don't love her, your more afraid of loosing her and you probably have some sort of Stockholm syndrome, and she's pretty much emotionally abused your confidence to the point your afraid of calling it quits. Your a loyal guy, the problem isn't your loyalty the problem is you gave your loyalty and your protection. And love to the wrong person who came to you with an empty cup, cracked and full of problems while you came with a full cup without cracks. If you look back from where you started till now look how far you've fallen …. you may say she's the best thing that has ever happened to you .. but is she really? Last I checked someone who is the best that has happened to another they absolutely don't treat their man like that let alone you. She doesn't like who you are that's perfect reason to leave shes not forced to stay with you neither are you, meaning she doesn't like ” YOU FOR YOU” which is something you claimed to want, currently your a provider bro/cash cow and you don't deserve to be used. She needs hell of therapy and you need to let her go G or you leave and ghost. You said she goese out? On your money? Yeah no God knows what debauchery she's up to, your basically giving her access to meet other men who she's deems a “bigger better deal” meanwhile your at home and you can't go with her? He'll no g. Also she said that your secondary to her main goal? That's very masculine and seems like her mother likely was domineering I know out of sheer experience been there done that. And this is only gonna get worse bro I promise, resentment will build even more and you gotta run now before you absolutely loose yourself to the point of no return. How can you claim to love someone bro if you don't even love yourself enough to even stop tolerating her crap. Listen bro these kinds of woman this will sound insane but they are for recreational purpose. A femenine, fit, friendly cooperative and agreeable woman would absolutely have and put YOU first .. I have a woman that's exactly this and she knows for a fact that any of this shit I wouldn't tolerate, she wouldn't dare. Your gonna have to boss up dude take her clothes, put it in black bags and kick her out, and tell her to go chase her “main goal” and go to her parents house, clearly she's choosing career over her man maybe to be husband, this is not wife material sorry. Get rid of her fast not slow.
Something you have to understand about drinking and drugs is that they lower your decision making skills. I understand you “didn't do anything” “it meant nothing” to you but you clearly know that it would mean something to your boyfriend. An easy guide to avoid these situations is:
If you want to be good friends with an ex, no drinking together alone. They should at least hang out with you and your partner before you have bar hangs otherwise.
Don't drink or do drugs heavily 1v1 with someone you are, were, or could be romantically interested in. As someone who did cheat in the past, this has been helpful. If you don't put yourself in a position to fuck up your relationship, you won't fuck up your relationship.
When you have a fight, go to literally ANY OTHER PERSON you have to lean on than your ex.
I realize that you will have to on-line and learn these things for yourself. But living with a guilty conscious will not help you be a better partner, nor will it help your relationship. I'd suggest coming clean and saying you fucked up, and talk about what your plan is to not ever do that again because you realize how unfair and shitty it was to do.
Yeah this happens over say the first 4 months of the relationship and we have been together for nearly a year now. I know I’m not the rebound it’s just this one situation that’s bugging me and I want to know weather I’m in the right to be a little pissed off
“Sharing everything decidedly unhealthy”.
I never really considered that as last relationships I always had something in common and shared interests before we started dating.
Thanks
That's just an excuse he's making. After all that you do for him, basically being his mother, he knows what type of wife and mother you would be. I'm gonna say it…he's probably interested in someone else. His excuse is fucking lame.
Same. If you maintain a home everyday (without children), you would only spend an hour or two tops. Maybe a day or two a month doing a deep clean of something but two people don’t wreck a house in one day.
I can't help you; my advice stopped being useful when you were experiencing this problem in the dating phase
He’s an emotionally abusive cheater. If he ever intended to change, he’d have gone to therapy already. Instead, he’s just using it as bait to get you back. Trusting this person would be a serious mistake.
I'm not a therapist, but my tip for you is to leave this jerk. You are doing all the work and he thinks it's just fine to physically hurt you. Why would you settle for that?
Take care, OP. It sounds like he is capable of seriously hurting you.
It’s 100% normal to talk about the artistry of tattoos.
I can guarantee that if the tone was what I was asking about you would have known. There’s no getting around the kind of tone that I was concerned about. Given that you’re not able to pinpoint it as suggestive or sexual my advice is to take a breather and calm down.
People talk about and like to look at tattoos. They talk about the themes in the artistry, the work of different artists, the motivations behind them, etc. This sounds completely innocent and normal.
Expecting support is expecting her to help you with your problems. You're asking too much. She's too young to handle your very serious issues and you need to back off.
No one has the sole responsibility to make sure you don’t end your life, and it is unfair for you to have that expectation of the people around you. That is an unfair burden you are placing on people and then getting upset that they aren’t willing to carry the weight of your life on their shoulders. Your responses reek of trying to get her attention and being pissed that she didn’t take the bait.
You need professional help, and if you are truly on the verge of committing suicide you should check yourself into a hospital to get stabilized on the right medications and start therapy.
Thank you! I was thinking this myself. I side eye anybody who doesn’t have at least 50/50 custody of their child REAL hot. My best friend has done everything in her power to get 100% custody from her abusive ex, they started at 50/50 and he still gets every other weekend despite the kid constantly coming home from dad’s house with bruises. If you have no custody you are a walking red flag
Ok, you do you and ignore the advice given by not only my old (experienced) self, but also numerous other posters. I'm sure you'll be fine. Moving in together after 6 months because of “convenience” sounds like a great plan.
Lol the amount of bs that , y’all put up with us crazy
I’ve read every response 🙂 and he when we were talking about how it’d never feel like my home, he said it’s not going to unless I “earn” it. Like how you have to buy your own house with money you’ve earned. He said I’d earn it by just helping more around the house (which I already do the dishes every time I’m there), fixing more things, doing different projects, etc. Just leaving my mark on the place. I get that but none of that changes the fact that the house is in his and his mom’s name. And that his mom would have to approve of every single thing we wanted to do, and that it takes time to earn something like that so where’d that put me in the beginning.