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Is your Partner's Cold or Ignoring Behavior Normal?
It can be normal for people to withdraw or become more distant when they are upset about something. However, it is important to examine why this behavior is happening and if it is an acceptable way to handle stress. If you feel ignored and isolated from your partner when they are upset, then it may be time to have a honest conversation with them about how their behavior affects you. Additionally, it is important to explore how you can work together as a couple to support each other better in times of stress.
I would see a therapist and see what’s causing you to have issues with communicating your feelings.
Its your life bro. Stop worrying about what other people think. If you like her you should not feel obligated to dump her just because your brother doesn't like her.
You need to tell him and his girlfriend that the way they treat her is not acceptable to you. It might be very hot for you but its something you need to learn to do.
If you don't set boundaries people will walk all over you and your girlfriend won't respect you.
My advice block him and move on.
On friday we were on a date and she got all ready for it she got dressed up did her makeup and i ended up letting my friend tag along who was near where we were and he spoiled the whole day for her bc id missed the memo that it was supposed to be just us. This was even worse and im so confused as to how i fucked it up becsuse shed had a really bad weekend prior, and i told her to just look forward to monday because i would take her out and stuff but i didnt check my phone that morning and missed a bunch of stuff she asked about confirming time and location etc. Which had her really worried because of how much she likes to plan stuff. We ended up just going to her place and i spent the night there but we were supposed to make up for that on friday. I missed a bunch of texts about friday the night before too and then the rest happened.
I felt really terrible friday night when we were at my place after going out which is when she told me she was upset about my friend being with us. We seemed to like make up and talk through it and we moved into some intimacy but afterward she seemed upset again and i felt almost as if id pushed her into it or maybe that we werent reconciled and i took her home and it was left really awkward. Afterwards i messaged her to make sure things were all good, and she said she would be a bit quieter with me for a few days but otherwise she was totally fine. Shes been trying to talk to me a bit today but im just so upset with myself over last week that i kind of pushed her away even when she asked if anything was up.
We're seeing each other in a few days and i want to hash things out there but throughout our relationship ive felt this really strong build up of one sidedness in me always being the one who apologises and her always being the one who forgives. And im so grateful for how forgiving she is but i think its starting to make me hate myself no matter how like insignificant so much of it is in the bigger picture.
I thought we agreed you’re leaving me alone in the DMs. Leave me alone already stalker.
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I’m so sorry. This sounds so tough. Does he put similar effort into how he looks?
Yeah why would you want to date a cheater who will obviously cheat on you too. I can't even comprehend how you would still have any positive thought about the guy.
As for the intrusive thoughts. Stay busy focus on hobbies, read, work out that kind of stuff. Whenever I think about my EX like that I start doing push ups until I can't go any longer. Meditation also helps.
Well, she's definitely not looking for getting married too soon, around 30 years old ig so it's gonna be a while. And ay, dating only for a few months but I have known her for a while.
This.
This.
Oh I used to use a similar approach for my kids using cheap conditioner – we absolutely slathered it on, and left it on for a while under a shower cap… and then the lice suffocated yay! Much easier to comb out than the chemical treatments, and much kinder on the scalp.
So leave her
What exactly will that achieve? Certainly not anything positive. Talk about the issue like adults. Doing petty shit like that will only make the issue worse than it had to be. If you’re trying to make things more toxic that seems to be the only thing you’re achieving
You say she loves you but nothing you have written so far is indicative of that.
Were you initiating at times she was clearly not interested? Like when she was busy, upset, exhausted, etc.? Those sound like knee jerk responses to being asked at inappropriate times.
You are a sensible person. I know it's a bigger issue in my mind than in the real world. How do i break the ice and start a convo about that?
Why is this so American lmao! Anyways the age gap, the patronising, the thinking American English is the way English is to be spoken when you actually come from the place the language originated from is so sad and amusing. He’s going to do this forever because he’s just an insufferable person. If it’s not this it’ll be something else he constantly critics you over. It’s why men with his mindset go for younger women to always feel superior, everything about them is a competition and a lot of the times rooted in mysogony because they don’t play stupid tit for tat games with other men for fear of push back, with women though no problem.
“Oh hey so you know that mole I had on my face? Got it removed today. Been bothering me. Hope the scar looks cool!”
Dont make it a big deal, its not.
When that's the term they chose for themselves. It's not rocket surgery.
She was there to dance, you were there to pick up women.
Updateme!
I agree the guy is a jackass, but using the pull out method thinking your not going to get pregnant makes them both idiots. Granted only 13 states actually teach a curriculum based health class about sex, so I’m not surprised they would think that this would work.
I literally like the pain around the dick and balls.
The ass wax is just for me, I have almost no body hair and can’t grow a beard, all of it ended up in my damn ass crack for some reason. Waxing is a lot better than shaving I can tell you. ?
If you’re going to argue about the immigrant thing that’s one thing. But if you’re going to completely dismiss valid reasons why this would be harder on OP & the kid and just pretend everything is perfectly fine to justify then there’s no point in this conversation.
Yes, being a way for a month when you have a young child is a big deal. Yes, it puts a lot more work and stress on OP. Pretending it doesn’t and writing all that off doesn’t change the fact that it’s true.
Don’t waste your time on someone who you aren’t compatible with. He’s going to drag you down with him.
Your user name checks out lol
Totally your choice. I would line up a new place to stay before you break up, though.
Get blunt. Tell him that he doesn't just smell a little, he smells a lot, and it's very noticable.
Explain clearly that you do not like having to sleep next to him while he smells and that he needs to shower before bed. (Or earlier in the evening if he doesn't like going to bed damp).
Explain that because you care you've been softballing the issue to spare his feelings but that it's clearly an issue.
Finally, Explain that he should see a doctor because since generic products aren't working it's likely he's got a condition they will help with.
If he doesn't sort himself out, consider if that's a deal breaker for you. I personally couldn't handle being with someone who wouldn't try and fix a problem with terrible odor.
making him sexually frustrated because he doesn’t get what he wants in me since i no longer, after having two kids, look like he wants me to look but that he understands it and I should understand this is where he gets his fix.
This man is a pile of trash. You are dating a sentient, walking pile of shit and garbage.
Wake up.
Honestly, long distance basically never works. Relationships (usually) require intimacy and physical closeness, and regardless of modern technology, there are no iCuddles.
The only time this stuff can really work is if it's for a defined period of time and you both know you'll be back together in 6 months, a year, etc. If it's indefinite then yeah, it's highly unlikely to work out, and you just end up as pen pals.
For most people, I generally don’t see how sex without any visual component could be satisfying long term, and additionally, your last sentence? If she can’t be exposed with you, the person she has chosen to be partners in life with, how is that healthy?
Your father sounds like an absolute cancer.
And no, your marriage is none of his business. It sounds like you should lay down the boundary that he is not to share his opinions about women in your presence, and if he can't keep them to himself, go low/no contact. If your soon-to-be wife finds out he has these opinions, she has every right to not want a relationship with him either.