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Nice to meet u, Im Lisa!, 19 y.o.
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Ask him about it. Don't prejudge anything until he speaks his piece.
Why does it matter if she knows? Clearly she needs to know
Mommy milkers
Dump her, she doesnt make you feel safe.
I guess you have some thinking to do. Do you want to be right or do you want to be married?
What part of the story do did you find that out from?
Why do i feel so sad to lose him if he is 🙁
He's acting like this because his brain is in a feedback loop. He screwed up, he knows it, you know it, everyone knows it… but he can't acknowledge that because it would destroy his life. So he's just throwing everything out hoping something will give him some “reasonable doubt.”
So let me see if I can understand what he's saying: He says a hacker hacked your sisters phone and sent ONLY naughty pictures ONLY to him? And then he contacted a “Dark-web” hacker to track down what happened and this hacker says he needs to cut off his own finger, as payment for said information, by the time he's 45? Is he supposed to send said finger to the hackers address sometime in the next fifteen years?
Haha, what a plan. He thinks he can give himself plausible deniability AND be a victim at the same time.
You are a passive passenger in your own life. So was my mom. My dad was incredibly complex, with the capacity to be very loving and very cruel. Her constant support of dad led her to make decisions that forced me to find support elsewhere. She essentially showed me through her actions, even long after his death, that I couldn't rely on her, so now I don't need her and won't see her. She is already dead to me.
You aren't that far off from that with your kids. The only thing that would have saved our relationship was her taking some control and responsibility in her own life, enough to show me that I actually mattered to her. This is the decision that you're struggling with now because you fear the unknown. I hope you have the courage to take the steps my mom refused to take. She was capable, as are you, but she chose not to and that is unforgivable to me.
That is a very valid point that I have never thought about regarding these scenarios.
See if she will leave now. Since she is moving back with the parents, it shouldn't matter to her when it is.
Both of them did a worse thing with you like your sister doing this to check his loyalty for you that you never asked and him not saying that someone might be pranking him so he wants to continue this to know who it was. It might be possible that he told this as you caught him and he had no other things to say and your sister might have bad intention towards your relationship and that is why she did everything to make sure that your relationship gets ruined.
Haha fair I didn’t mean that in a rude way towards you
I would not date someone who I did not feel I could talk about things with because they cannot abide by my boundaries and that THEY would feel upset when I told them it was inappropriate to pester me about it.
He’s super attentive and notices the second I’m not okay and asks about it, he gets my humor(my bf does not), I really love my bf but we’ve been thru some shit recently.
You buy the test bring it to her don’t let her supply it
Perhaps think of this as a gift. Instead of feeling insecure that he desires his colleague, you can feel secure in that her husband desired you and that brought to light the reality of the situation through the reaction of your husband and her. If it was only about having group sex, it would be about everyone pleasing everyone, taking turns etc. But it was about them being able to have sex with their spouses permission and her husband and you kinda bitch slapped them in the face with the realization that their spouses can want others and be wanted by others too.
op – sincerely, your bf sounds like a dickhead.
that you are flagellating your self FOR DOING NOTHING WORNG!!! with phrases like “i cant excuse my decision” etc.. scream that this guy is an angry asshat who is clearly emotionally abusive and emotionally manipulative.
He isnt a safe space. He's a nasty pasty who doesn't want to see you happy, or to have any choices in your own life.
Enjoy your beautiful beautiful dog.
Leave this truly nasty cruel bully of a bf on the curb.
Dont date your bully op. Thats what this guy is.
Please choose you and your own goldneness!
And look into some kind, curious, supportive therapy if its an option, to unpack why on earth you think you deserve such a controlling partner. You deserve great stuff op, not what this man is.
This bitch gotta go
That means he’s going to do whatever he wants whenever he wants. Pay attention to what he’s actually telling you.
Yup, marine corps. Just got out in November. You know how it is. It’s normal in the military to be married young
Literally, one of the reasons I left my 3 year relationship was because my ex didn't know how to properly wash his balls. I literally had to remind him to wash them before sex when he hadn't showered for 2 days. It was so repulsive. Then he would just go wash them in the sink with handsoap, and they would still smell. Date an adult, dude, that's nasty. My new boyfriend smells so good all of the time, even when he's been sweating all day.
We old folks tend not to drink enough water. For whatever reason (possibly diminished physical activity), we're just not that thirsty.
My mother just turned 89, she has senile dementia, she doesn't take in adequate fluids, and she is constantly getting UTIs.
I'm in my early to mid sixties, and if I didn't keep bottles of water by me all the time, I know I'd forget to drink.
Sounds more like an autistic breakdown or something like that. In any case, she clearly needs help to deal with anger and anxiety issues. Every individual and every relationship goes through troubled times. If it were up to this sub, not a single relationship would survive. It seems to be full of people who have been in a bad relationship for too long. Which makes sense when you think about it, but it results in very biased responses.
Or, since his mom is presumably going to be at the lake house, is he gonna ask her to put together something for them? Or even just snag some leftovers from the fridge vs. actually doing the food himself?
Honey, we all get annoying and frustrating at times. That is absolutely no excuse for anyone to call you names or try to brainwash you into believing you are always at fault.
He is insecure and jealous and instead of dealing with his issues and improving himself he is invalidating you to make himself feel better, and yes, if you stay he will hit you.
Unfortunately far too many of us have picked partners that prey upon our weaknesses and vulnerabilities, and all we can do is learn to have the self-respect to know we deserve better.
Leave, stay single, and work on yourself, so when the next time comes around, the man you pick will be the one that matches your increased self-esteem.
It sounds like he “needs” alcohol to function. Or rather, his body and mind tell him that this is the case – hence the drinking before doing seemingly normal tasks such as dates.
As others have said, it sounds like he is an addict. The first sign is the fact that he is denying his drinking even being a problem – which addicts do when they get presented with their addiction being a problem.
This will be a long and very hot road to go down, should you choose to help him with this addiction. I think he needs to realise that he needs help on his own, you can't solve his addiction for him.
Whether or not you decide to go on that journey with him is another question. It may take him months or years to realise the issue that he has, and then a lot of time to resolve it. So, you will need to decide for yourself if he and the relationship are worth that investment.