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.hiding the fact she's going on holiday with an old flame is pretty damn UNtrustworthy.
If she left u over this, imo she's been looking for a reason. Especially if she's ghosting and won't even talk it out. Honestly tho, she's acting like a teenager
Yes, I did ask. We do not live! together. I basically see him when he allows me to have access or when he comes over to my place. The rest is based off what he chooses to respond to and when.
OP. Please dump this man. You are going through something awful and this asshole of a partner who should be supporting you through this is more focused on how often you're touching his penis and punishing and threatening you with hiring sex workers when you don't.
Forgive me, but do you think this situation will get any better when you are going through the worst stages of your mother's illness? Or the parts that come after? This man is abusive and manipulative and you are very vulnerable at the moment. OP, you need to get out now and save yourself the pain and damage he can do when you are bereaved and defenceless against this kind of manipulation and abuse.
Be kind to yourself. Leave this awful person behind. Save your energy, you need it for you and your family right now. xx
How you navigate that conversation is you just sit down, you tell her you don't see yourself marrying her but do still see yourself getting married to someone not-her, and then let it go from there. It's really not that complicated and there's not much to overthink here.
She will, and the trust your kids have in you will be shaken. They deserve a say in whether you bring her back into their lives.
Well… generally if two people are married the savings are viewed as theirs, so it would be reasonable for her to be able to use some of it.
I’ve said it happens once. It’s just made me feel shit. Made me realise I’m not happy at all rn
Don't date coworkers
Oh ok. I guess maybe it is some kind of fear of abandonment. I have felt similar with my wife, but I trace it back to my relationship with my father.
I have worked on it a lot, but I couldn't stand someone being mad at me.
I would describe myself as the exact opposite of a feminist but I have to ask….. If it was a male friend doing the same thing, would you resent them?
I just don't want to lead him on of its not going to work.
Wow, you really are 19. Why don’t you stay single for a while and let yourself date and have fun. Your girlfriend would be really hurt. If she knew you had somebody else so be kind or let her go and you do whatever it is you’re gonna do for the next 10 years?
You have to decide if it’s a dealbreaker or not. He’s made it clear he doesn’t want to marry you. He’s getting the perks of a wife without making the commitment as a husband, so there’s no incentive for him to get married.
A few things, for starters you don't have to put your dream job on hold for anyone. This was a new relationship and you absolutely did not need to do that. You made a very irresponsible decision.
Secondly, I can see how not having almost anything in common can actually push someone to be acesexual. A lot of people need good chemistry but sometimes that happens when you both have some things in common. It doesn't have to be everything, at least some things. You don't really need to become friends to date. Part of dating means getting to know person over time, but also it means it's ok to pull the plug when it's not working out.
This really isn't working out and it doesn't have to be anyone's fault. Have the big talk with him and end it. You guys can still stay decent/friends while finding other, more suitable partners.
A few things, for starters you don't have to put your dream job on hold for anyone. This was a new relationship and you absolutely did not need to do that. You made a very irresponsible decision.
Secondly, I can see how not having almost anything in common can actually push someone to be acesexual. A lot of people need good chemistry but sometimes that happens when you both have some things in common. It doesn't have to be everything, at least some things. You don't really need to become friends to date. Part of dating means getting to know person over time, but also it means it's ok to pull the plug when it's not working out.
This really isn't working out and it doesn't have to be anyone's fault. Have the big talk with him and end it. You guys can still stay decent/friends while finding other, more suitable partners.
That’s what’s confusing to me. When I call him out for it and ask if he genuinely wants to break up and ask why he’s mentioning it he says it’s just a joke and asks why I take everything so seriously. When I don’t pay it any mind he’ll ask me why I don’t love him anymore so maybe he’s just saying it to get a reaction out of me. Besides this he’s kind and we get along good but it’s just this little thing that annoys me and makes me hold back in the relationship
No.
They are not a guest.
They are someone who is over often, they probably stopped by unannounced, so they do not get treated as a guest.
I think you need to let the separate finances ride out for a while, if you want to try and salvage this. It may come up as a wake up call for both of you. She may realize that she needs your income to help pay for the car, you may realize that you can afford one yourself…or you could realize that it all works out just fine either way.
My husband and I did for years, before and after marriage. This is the exact reason why. So we kept spending bank accounts separate, saved separate, and had a joint account for shared expenses. We each added in our share each month and called it good. Worked great.
I’m autistic and male, and I’d be the first to plead for tolerance of inadvertently ‘rude’ words or behaviour from autistic people, but there is no excusing what you describe, particularly if it’s part of a pattern. It’s verbal abuse, and is inexcusable.
It sounds to me like he needs some time to reflect by himself – I would think seriously about staying with him if I were you. But please be careful because that sort of verbal abuse is so extreme that you need to ensure you’re safe when speaking to him about it.
I really appreciate this comment. I totally understand his logic in choosing it. He knew I didn’t want him to spend a lot, but he decided diamonds were a safer choice. So he decided to spend more money on smaller diamonds than he would have spend on a larger colored stone that he worried I’d tire of. I completely understand the decision and I can see the thoughtfulness in it even if it wasn’t quite what I’d envisioned.
Thankfully we haven’t picked bands out yet and I’m leaning towards finding a cool colored stone wedding band. It’s just hard to find something that doesn’t completely overtake the engagement ring. He saw me looking at colorful bands recently and I think that may have tipped him off on the disappointment a bit ?
3-4 months and long distance and already being this much of a horse's ass?
Please, leave him. He's abusive and awful.
There are southern European countries where people still do this — Greece and Cyprus for example. It’s because the plumping systems aren’t built to handle paper.
im sorry for the awful formatting. its hard to copy paste because there is no images in the sub allowed
Calling an adult woman a child is condescending beyond belief for her plus painting me as a pedophile for dating an adult is nothing more than idiotic. You call her a child, while acting as a child yourself.
If you dont have anything rational to add, please refrain from saying anything. I will not argue with you on such a childish level.
Samesies her. But they need a certain degree of quality.
Mine do have a heating function often also. And smell of lavender. 57 years old.
Plus one special collectors bear sitting behind glass.