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Maybe she wants to establish her boundaries with him through your presence.
Who knows? You have to ask her.
Just because you feel bad and you are insecure doesn't mean he has to change every aspect of his life to accommodate this behaviour. You need to do some internal work and grow, it's not your boyfriend's place to do certain things. You placing that burden on him is not only unrealistic but also unfair. Rather than telling him to skip through scenes, go for therapy. And learn to love your body. Because what's next, don't have female friends that you find prettier than you? Don't work with women who look a certain way? You're unintentionally being toxic and controlling.
Yes it would.
She wants her child to experience a life with a mother and grandmother.
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Thank you, I did bring this information to him yesterday and requested that he removes any and all pictures of my child and I from his socials. He seemed apologetic but I know it’s just because he was embarrassed that he was caught. Unfortunately, I have to still stay in his home while I’m making arrangements to move out so I can’t address his family now but I will once my child and I are no longer living here. Because if his Mom genuinely believes that this is her grandchild, I think she should know the truth.
I wouldn’t want your partners boss to hear about this in any way. So I wouldn’t create any drama that he could find out about. After you graduate you will want his help networking to find a good position. He absolutely won’t want to hear that he helped scammers or worse, think that you are “jealous “. The refugees sound like they have quite a bit of resources by now, they speak English, they’ve moved out. They are actually ready to be independent; let them go without any drama. You are a busy grad student, Christmas is over, new term, it makes perfect sense for you to become quite busy and completely unavailable. Start saying if they contact you about how well established they are (don’t need anything more). You can mention some totals (gifts, money) in a very “wow, it’s so great you’ve gotten such a great amount of support for your new life!” if they ask for more help. When they ask for rides etc you ask them if they need help finding the website with all the bus schedules etc so they can integrate into city life in Canada. Basically play dumb, be very satisfied with how well they’ve been treated, and of course incessantly busy with school. If all fails and they try to guilt you into more help, simply mention that your partner has been looking into helping other refugees and he is simply too strapped for time or resources to continue helping them since they’ve already arrived and have received so much. Wish them well, grit your teeth, and ring off forever. Feel free to block them after that. Definitely don’t stir this pot or sour the experience with partners boss!
If she wants to stay with you, she quits her job.
Trust comes from acting in accordance with what you say you’re going to do. So if you had an affair, you stop seeing your AP. You can’t be expected to believe she’s stopped the affair if she continues to see the guy every day. Her actions must match her words. If they don’t, she’s not asking you to trust her – she’s asking you to be naive and gullible.
Your welcome.
As an aside, I’ve had BF’s with a wide range in sizes and I personally prefer smaller to larger. But end of the day, don’t really care as long as we can find mutual satisfaction. But I’m older and understand that sex is more than PIV. If my spouse suddenly started having issues with ED, we’d just find other ways to get each other off and enjoy intimacy.
How do you figure? She sat at a bar and talked to someone, when he made an inappropriate advance she left. That’s what is SUPPOSED to happen
If you rely on “it was the booze, not me,” then it will be the booze next time it happens. He will have zero reason to believe you’ll do any better next time, because according to you, the booze is in control. Not you.
Grow up and take responsibility for yourself.
I mean, you stop having sex with her and tell her that being FWB isn't working out for you. That you don't have any interest in any other type of relationship either….. And stop having sex with her.
If youre a dependent living with mommy and daddy and they give you money, yeah they have a say just like they have a say on how their money is spent before they hand it to you.
Move out, make your own money, pay for your things and then the situation will be totally different.
Don't allow him to get you pregnant if he's not willing to compromise.
It doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about. Mutual attraction can exist between friends without turning into anything more. It sounds like there was never any real desire to be anything but friends and they only humoured the attraction because they were both single and lonely.
Seriously the perfect thing to say to someone like this.
Please leave. They are manipulating you. Your mental health is going to suffer if you stay.
Also, do your laundry, but not theirs. They are an adult. They can wash their own stuff.
You seem super sweet. I think you are too good for him. It shouldn't be this difficult to get some romance from a bf.
I can’t help but asking whether 8 years in was the first time marriage was discussed? I would expect it to come up way before. The willingness, the timeliness.
That aside, sounds like you’re in for a spontaneous expression of love and grand romantic gestures. The whole bit around “could you live! without me?” is imho very dramatic and my answer would quite likely be similar to his. Not because of lack of love or commitment but because I also find that level of attachment unhealthy. I had the misfortune of surviving a lot of people I deeply loved and while painful, it did not end my life. When someone asks me “what couldn’t you live without?”, my answer has always been “oxygen”, even when I was a kid.
You need an honest conversation about your future goals and what’s your outlook on life. Marriage, children, emotional needs. It is possible that you’re going to realize that your priorities do not align and you’ll have to go your separate ways.
You don’t seem to be listening to the multiple people explaining to you in other comments that her response in the moment was one of de-escalation with self-preservation in mind.
Although I don’t recommend it, you could live! separately once your lease is up and still date.
I don’t believe he actually has OCD considering he’s done a full 180. If he really has OCD, hiding or suppressing his compulsions would be causing mental stress, not “freeing” him.
You have every right to feel manipulated. You’ve been begging him to seek help for a year, stating how much his OCD is effecting you, and yet, he only cares when you’re ready to walk away…
Doesn't sound like he is into you. Have a conversation.
I understand the feeling when your number is less but 3 is really nothing man. I am pretty sure my gf has been with 50+ people.
Work on letting go of that type of jealousy and appreciate that you both want each other right now.
Customer service and interviews are way different from actually meeting people outside of those situations where everybody knows there's so many assholes. Meeting a person to actually make a connection and keep them in your personal life? People will absolutely be on their best behavior until they believe they have you invested. That's how so many abusive relationships happen as well.