My mother is white and my father is black and all my life I've dealt with racism from my mother and from her white children from her first marriage, and I think the people telling you that having black grandchildren will automatically flip a switch in their brain are very wrong. If I were you, I would try to limit contact between my kids and the grandparents and in instances where they are the subject of verbal attacks, try to instill a sense of self-worth and pride in them.
What does that have to do with anything? My partner and I both have 2 year college diplomas. So same “level” but their course was technology and mine was education/child development. I couldn't do a week in their field and mine would have them running for the hills in a few hours
Your emergency meeting is the right first choice. There are a few possibilities, but only he will be able to tell you. I'm not jumping to this conclusion, but if this is an attempt to subtly pressure you to passively accept monogamy, I would be very cautious about continuing this relationship.
Yeah, I get that you have a personal experience with a fraudster in the family and that sucks, but again we have no idea if the natures of the crime that you were victim to and the nature of the crime that OP’s father committed is the same. I simply wouldn’t ascribe your anecdotal experience to everyone who has committed fraud when I know it’s a crime with such a wide range of meanings. If he needs to prove himself, I have no reason to believe 11 years of prison contact and 2 months of time outside hasn’t been enough to prove himself honestly, and OP’s wife has refused to meet him so I fail to see how she will ever see him as having proved himself
She needed 200 for rent but 1500 for a car payment? Who can drive a car with a payment like that without having the income to cover it. I’ve never heard of anyone I know having that big a car payment. That math ain’t mathin. And what was your solution for the 200?
I hate this answer of “staying for the kids”. What happens when the kids grow up and leave the house, you just have each other, then what? If anything it’s better to show honesty and how to work through your emotions in front of kids; my parents did this for a bit and it was horrible watching them be angry/robots to each other then they got divorced and much better. Life is way too short to be unhappy and is more progressive now than the previous generation where if you’re not happy you can leave the relationship.
I think he’s over reacting considering that he still hasn’t personally put it on your finger yet. I get it if he’s upset for a bit but if it continues for long then that’s not right.
How long this been going on?
My mother is white and my father is black and all my life I've dealt with racism from my mother and from her white children from her first marriage, and I think the people telling you that having black grandchildren will automatically flip a switch in their brain are very wrong. If I were you, I would try to limit contact between my kids and the grandparents and in instances where they are the subject of verbal attacks, try to instill a sense of self-worth and pride in them.
What does that have to do with anything? My partner and I both have 2 year college diplomas. So same “level” but their course was technology and mine was education/child development. I couldn't do a week in their field and mine would have them running for the hills in a few hours
10 months later you still trying to figure this out
Lol if that’s what helps you sleep
Your emergency meeting is the right first choice. There are a few possibilities, but only he will be able to tell you. I'm not jumping to this conclusion, but if this is an attempt to subtly pressure you to passively accept monogamy, I would be very cautious about continuing this relationship.
Yeah, I get that you have a personal experience with a fraudster in the family and that sucks, but again we have no idea if the natures of the crime that you were victim to and the nature of the crime that OP’s father committed is the same. I simply wouldn’t ascribe your anecdotal experience to everyone who has committed fraud when I know it’s a crime with such a wide range of meanings. If he needs to prove himself, I have no reason to believe 11 years of prison contact and 2 months of time outside hasn’t been enough to prove himself honestly, and OP’s wife has refused to meet him so I fail to see how she will ever see him as having proved himself
She needed 200 for rent but 1500 for a car payment? Who can drive a car with a payment like that without having the income to cover it. I’ve never heard of anyone I know having that big a car payment. That math ain’t mathin. And what was your solution for the 200?
If you keep doing what he says, why should he stop?
You can stop going to his house.
You can all him when he'll be ready. If he says 6, show up at 730.
Bet he'll learn or you dump him.
Break up.
I hate this answer of “staying for the kids”. What happens when the kids grow up and leave the house, you just have each other, then what? If anything it’s better to show honesty and how to work through your emotions in front of kids; my parents did this for a bit and it was horrible watching them be angry/robots to each other then they got divorced and much better. Life is way too short to be unhappy and is more progressive now than the previous generation where if you’re not happy you can leave the relationship.
I think he’s over reacting considering that he still hasn’t personally put it on your finger yet. I get it if he’s upset for a bit but if it continues for long then that’s not right.