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He said once and I agree that its worth waiting and fighting for our good moments. He cried when he wanted me back, wrote me a song and for that whole mont even when he had a chance he didn't chase after anyone else. I am his first love so I know I'm special to him but I just can't understand why he acts so bad towards me sometimes. Today he apologized and said that its gonna be fine and I just need to not bring up some deep conversations. I want to do that but it scares me because I don't get it why he won't talk about anything.
Move in with a friend?
This happened to me about 7 years ago, she remembers, she does know they had sex but thinks telling you straight away will resolve the relationship but if you have that nagging doubt now it will only get worse and worse, imo I would leave her as she can't be trusted when drunk and around other people, find yourself a decent woman who's willing to be loyal. The alcohol excuse is as old as time bro
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He says vasectomy is “too invasive” when it’s a day procure and a tiny cut, compared to a tubal?
And he refuses to wear condoms?
It’s of course his right to refuse to have a vasectomy, but you seem to have married a selfish ass.
Echoing everyone here saying your wife WILL give your child an eating disorder without serious intervention NOW. Get whatever you can from her in writing in case you need to keep her from getting full custody later. This is so unhinged and cruel.
Often, when people leave their marriage/relationship for their affair partner, it's difficult to admit it was a horrible decision. Nobody wants to admit to friends and family that tearing apart their loved ones was a selfish mistake. Sometimes we stubbornly try to make it work with someone that we really don't love. You commited the ultimate betrayal for someone you didn't really know beyond a surface level.
Fantasy is ALWAYS better than reality. You need to break up bc if you don't, you'll be getting a divorce a couple of years down the road. You can't trust your fiance. Ever. If she'll cheat with you she'll cheat on you, and vice-versa. She is not a great catch and i think you know it. Get some IC to deal with your issues and become better man. Do the right thing OP. Good luck.
I’ve always been curious about what someone who posts something like this expects to get as feedback.
Guy here. Went out with a bunch of women, some great and some not so great, before my wife and if any of them reached out to me I wouldn’t even reply except to tell them to leave me alone, to say nothing of “meeting up”.
OP it’s obvious that you need to reflect on exactly why you are motivated to see you ex-bf. The fact you brought this up with your husband means you’ve already planted the seed of your demise (or at least your marriage). You should really reflect on whether you are happy, truly happy because I’m not sure someone who is that would even consider what you’ve already done.
Maybe counselling, individual or couples, and then if there is something missing maybe you need to level with your husband.
One thing I didn't mention in my original post is that we worked together, and will most likely work together again during the summer. If he comes back and chooses to work again, that is.
And that is the first intelligent thing you have said all day.self-awareness is great. Good thing is, if you put in a little effort and, I don't know, get a fucking job until you are actually a wife or a mother, you might actually become a good girlfriend who he wants to marry and give you that life you want so badly. But if all you do is put in the minimum and expect the maximum, you'll never get anywhere in any damn relationship.
great post and story. cut yourself free from these things because they arent for you. just be honest and if you can, be her friend but dont let it drag you down
She is really great, and she was very open about it. Thank you for reaffirming that for me and making me realize I am overthinking this. I guess I am just weird with past flings, I know I have some trust issues from past relationships I need to work on clearly, lol. Thanks again for your input and making me realize it's all in my head.
I’m so sorry that you had to go through that
I sincerely hope that you are on a path to healing although it will always be with you mentally, I’m sure.
Sending you hugs from across the pond
Username checks out lol
You are being selfish trying to be in a relationship when you cannot give time to it. Stay single until your work load eases up.
Wait however long you need to. Get a bank account, a job, line up an apartment. Move out, block your mom, and inform your brother’s GF.
Until then, you are happy, you are obedient, and you have no issues with your brother’a cheating or your mom’s enabling.
Kids are not puppies. You are in no way shape or form ready to have a kid. Be careful havign sex with her because she might babyvtrap you.
Came here to say point no.3!! Steven’s responses and deletion is ABSOLUTELY SUSPICIOUS ……
His responses were CLEARLY egging her on…. And wanting to speak tomorrow..?! …… NO REJECTION at all… he was KEEPING IT OPEN… wake up OP