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If your husband stopped loving you because you had a baby and are struggling to lose the weight, that doesn't sound like he loved you very much to begin with.
My advice is to talk to him. Ask him how he thinks your marriage is doing. Check in with each other.
Also, talk to your doctor.
Coming from a woman's perspective, when it's gotten to this point and the jealousy is unbearable, it's not going to magically be fixed. You are both still fairly young and her jealousy is most likely stemming from insecurity and a lack of maturity.
Not saying she is a bad person, just been there done that when I was her age. The best way to approach this would be to sit down with her and let her know from the jump that this is a serious conversation and she needs to fully hear you out before saying anything. It's very easy to quickly jump to defend yourself and your actions.
Ask her why she feels so strongly about not having the manager around. Listen to her concerns and address them accordingly. If they are valid concerns, it can be easily worked through. If it's just ” I don't like her” or “I don't trust her” without examples to prove these feelings, then it stems back to insecurity and lack of maturity. That's something that you unfortunately can't fix.
Having a conversation as to why she's feeling this way may help her work through some of those feelings but you can't force her opinion to change.
The fact that Angel made a deathbed wish that her daughter was never to meet them… something serious happened that caused the NC. Protect that girl and block the family
Things to do with time can be very hard for people to understand.
I like to think I'm pretty smart. I'm a Data Analyst and Project Manager, graduated with honors from college, can pick up just about any software quickly, and have written three books.
But anything to do with time travel, or the space time continuum just does not track in my brain. I think the problem is that I'm a very linear thinker; like with writing, the idea that other authors skip around when writing their books blows my mind. I start with Chapter One keep going until I get to The End. Movies or books that mess with time I find really nude to follow.
As soon as we clear up the felony charges.
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?I was like holdup I can’t just skip past that
UpdateMe!
Vaginismus doesn't affect the function of a vagina or impact sex aside from potential smell. It is gross, not a performance issue. But yes, I would absolutely inform a woman who didn't seek medical attention over it that she's lucky her husband didn't dump her. Sex is important. Healthy sex is important. Acting insecure and refusing to seek help and do one's part to improve is absolutely one's own fault.
Look, I’ve been described as a rabid feminist. The age gap is absolutely a problem. It’s even stranger for women because it’s not socialised as normal. I am highly suspicious of her, her motives and her pregnancy.
You see where your dad is coming from? Where is that exact toxicity land? He sounds horribly controlling because your sister left the service and married a non American. So what she chose happiness good for her.
If you wanna keep a reaction with her I suggest you don't push her to reconnect with your father.
A great place to start would be to ask questions. What did they mean, why did they do that etc. When it comes to relationships we all bring our expectations, but it's about accommodating BOTH of the partners. Maybe they love fancy dinners, and thought you'd enjoy doing something that they liked. You can ask about the motivations for why they chose different things. “Hey, I'd love to hear more about your thinking behind the proposal. I'm so excited to get married to you but I'm having some feelings can you reassure me a little (that I was heard/ that I'll be considered in the future/ that my needs are being met and remembered etc etc etc)
And it's okay to have these feelings. It doesn't mean you're ungrateful or anything is wrong. A lot of marriage is finding out how to talk about ongoing issues while managing different baggage and communication styles. Also, not for nothing, people don't talk about it as much, but once a relationship moves to proposals and marriage, you're beginning to enact rituals, but we don't talk about it like that, and rituals can be intense. Big moves bring out a lot of complicated feelings even if they ARE perfect and everything we expected. (The day I got married felt so intense because you're participating in an ancient ritual, your making a vow UNTIL DEATH, talk about confronting your mortality)
Time to go. Pack. Move. Say toodaloo.
I was 19 going on 20 and my partner was 24 going on 25 when we got together, we're now 25 & 30 respectively. Although he has had a bit more time and experience in life I feel comfortable and on a similar level for the most part. Any misgivings we've had as a couple were while I was feeling out my desire for the nightlife and he had already went through that stage of his life.
I guess I can't talk much with a 5 year age difference but I think 20 & 29 is a bit wild for me. Babe you need to take the time to make your mistakes, maybe enjoy the night life and figure out who you are. This is a 29 year old man who is more than likely far past the life stage you're at and will soon be talking about settling down with kids before you even have dried ink on a college diploma. Are you ready for that reality?
I have to be honest there's a lot of older guys that are great at playing the long con of 'here's my 29/30/35YO boyfriend that's just as youthful and into road trips & other young adult things like me!' just so they can lock down a younger gal that's too inexperienced and lovestruck to smell his bullshit that's already wafted through the local crowd of mid-late 20's females
Tread carefully at the bare minimum
Reach out, ask to catch up. See where that goes?
Don't reach out to him, it's best to respect that people move on from friendships sometimes. If you really want to know then asking your mutual friend is the obvious choice.
Might be better to just try and move on to be honest.
Why would you be shocked? She didn’t press charges.
Now you have introduced a firearm to someone with poor judgment? ?♂️
Take her out for lunch and understand her thought process. Maybe you could reason with her? Why is she so desperate to be with him?
I also see from OP's post history that in the midst of all of this, she is getting totally elective cosmetic surgeries that, of course, have recovery time. These kids are screwed beyond belief.
im MEOWt
His thinking is archaic and just not how things work in a household. Easiest solution is to tell him that you're going to be setting up a chore chart and each of you are going to contribute equally on tasks.
Also don't let him weaponize incompetence when it comes to him cleaning.
Oh well then that's different. It will likely pass.
Yes, he's lazy and should understand by now that foreplay is often the most crucial part for women. If he doesn't understand that at 30, then you have to assume he doesn't have that much sexual experience or is just extremely selfish and only cares about using you for his own pleasure.
Make it clear to him that this is a major issue and that if he can't accommodate, then the relationship has no future.
It's one thing going soft because he isn't attracted to a specific sex act, its another not trying his best to make you sexually satisfied even by just using fingers tongue etc
What's different?
I feel like I'm taking crazy pills and it's 1950. What is with so many responses about a man not knowing how to do laundry? What is so hard about reading a laundry tag or saying “hey do you want this washed?” Yall the bar is in hell apparently. How do single men have decent clothes? It's laundry ffs. If you want a different basket then fine but it's not nude to figure out.
Except what happens when recently divorced friend catches fee fees and decides she wants to be the “wife” who isn’t asexual.
You’re a fool. He dumped you for the person he told you not to worry about, but comes running back after they break up? He sounds like someone who doesn’t know how to/want to be alone.
Whoever is telling you this is very shallow…please don't listen to anyone . It's nobody business who you date. Don't let people upset you…try to stay away from them. They are probably jealous.
And now, he wants for this friend of his (29M) to move in with us soon. And whenever this friend of his asks him to do anything, he’ll do it without question where when I ask it’s always like pulling teeth.
He's gay, closeted, and in love with his friend.
Um, yeah. She’s just a bitch. Among her giant host list of glaring issues, she’s also probably cheating on you, at least emotionally. Sorry dude.
As long as it isn't disruptive in some way (like he was late to work bc he prioritized going to look for it, or sth like that) then I would call this quirky weird, but not concerning weird.
Yep, I don't like thicc girls but I currently am in a situationship with a girl that I think I like (probably more as friends, but she still is important to me) who is formed like a greek goddess (thicc). She looks absolutely stunning to me yet I wouldn't persue anyone else like that.
Do you really want to be with a grown woman who throws toddler tantrums?
There are 4 Saturdays a month
Why the fuck do you want to salvage this shitty relationship so badly? He is ABUSIVE. MAKE HIM LEAVE. Divorce him.
Then he sounds pretty good overall. Or at least, I don’t think this is a sign of him being controlling. By now you’d be seeing it manifest in other ways too, I think.
Then he sounds pretty good overall. Or at least, I don’t think this is a sign of him being controlling. By now you’d be seeing it manifest in other ways too, I think.
Your friend is supremely self-centered and inconsiderate. She hasn’t the slightest qualm about setting you up and then running out on you, leaving you in the lurch with a lease to pay for, but expects you to chase after her and make her feel special.
Count yourself lucky that you’re no longer required to maintain a geostationary orbit around her emotional gravity well.
Okay I will try that
Stop being a fucking door mat, for fucks sake. It doesn’t matter if they “fell in love”, your “best friend” is a shitty person for having them in the wedding party and still associating with them. Im gonna be blunt. He is your best friend but you are not his. He doesn’t value you and you need to wake up and smell the roses. He hasn’t even invited you to be part of the wedding party yet he has asked others….
Not exactly. The type of condition she has makes it harder to get pregnant, so she’ll need to possibly go down IVF and/or fertility treatments. She’s using pills to make her symptoms regulated.
Yeah you're right but I am actually doing what I like, doing research and I have a stable job that I can keep doing even if I move abroad. I have never seen immigration as a 'goal' but I don't mind discovering other countries. It's true that the political and economic situations in my country are not the best and that is why he chose to leave but once you secure a job that you like and that pays well I would say it is one of the best places to live! in
A LOT of drama exist in those groups, and I would take whatever is said in those groups with a HUGE grain of salt.
And yes, it is public
What do you mean in the meantime? Be honest with your boyfriend. Tell him you aren’t going abroad, rather you’re pursuing another man and looking to move out.
Sorry that was what I meant but I see how I worded it wasn’t clear!!
Manipulator works, too!
GOOD FOR YOU for kicking him to the curb! Go have a FUN SUMMER!
She wants whatever attention you’re giving her, but she’s looking for something else and will leave when she finds it. Don’t do this to yourself. Your relationship with her has an expiration date already.
Let him.
Could you not just go for a shorter time? Say you gf goes for the full 5 days or whatever, and you go for the first two nights but then return home – you get some alone time, and she gets more time with her family.
Or you go every other trip, or something.
This seems like a thing that is possible to work out a compromise for, if y'all just talk about it.
Either she has some severe mental health issues to randomly be so insanely mean to someone who has been over the top helpful to her with out getting anything in return —or— someone told her something about you or about something you’ve said about her behind her back (whether it’s true or a lie).
I guess there’s a third option that some guy she’s dating sent that to you or forced her to because he jealous of your closeness with her.
Regardless, none of this is healthy for you. Even if someone told her that you said something about her behind her back, the only healthy response would be for her to have a conversation with you about it. It’s the very least she could do for someone who has been there for her as a friend more than what sounds like any other friend or family has (again, I assume without you getting any physical intimacy in return).
Maybe you can get some closure with her and try to at least get an explanation, but either way you need out of this unhealthy and unbalanced relationship where you are doing everything for her without any of the benefits of the type of relationship that I’m sure you desire. I’m a little shocked she would willingly cut this gravy train off.
Either she has some severe mental health issues to randomly be so insanely mean to someone who has been over the top helpful to her with out getting anything in return —or— someone told her something about you or about something you’ve said about her behind her back (whether it’s true or a lie).
I guess there’s a third option that some guy she’s dating sent that to you or forced her to because he jealous of your closeness with her.
Regardless, none of this is healthy for you. Even if someone told her that you said something about her behind her back, the only healthy response would be for her to have a conversation with you about it. It’s the very least she could do for someone who has been there for her as a friend more than what sounds like any other friend or family has (again, I assume without you getting any physical intimacy in return).
Maybe you can get some closure with her and try to at least get an explanation, but either way you need out of this unhealthy and unbalanced relationship where you are doing everything for her without any of the benefits of the type of relationship that I’m sure you desire. I’m a little shocked she would willingly cut this gravy train off.
Probably and ….. instead of addressing it, and being respectful to his friend, he was a coward and a disrespectful Arseh***
Unfortunately the problem is more than just your low self-esteem. No matter how much self-appreciation you may develop, if your bf leaves for her ex (should she reach out to him) it would be a blow anyway.
I am not quite sure what do, can he get over his ex to the point he would reject her if she wanted him back (to stay with you)? Maybe, maybe not. I don't want to lie here.
Got back together with an ex 2 Times.
If the reason you broke up is now no problem anymore, why Not try?
Don't try being friends with benefits with your ex. Either get back fully or leave it alone. You will fu** your feelings more than your ex. I just had a friend do that and he cried on my couch for 2 hours. Trying to find reasons to get back together when nothing really changed.
Reality: you go through with it and have immense resentment and anger towards him. Very few people enjoy seeing their spouse have sex w someone else. Would it be you w another guy? Doubt it.
Tbh you’ve been together 2 years and yeah ur engaged but this just seems like something he’ll bring up again and again until you inevitably say yes to get him to shut up and then the resentment i mentioned is created.
I won’t tell u what to do but I can tell u what i would do. I personally would’ve said peace the minute he suggested that bc there is nothing in my head that would ever want such a situation to occur and it’d tell me that we are clearly not sexually compatible. I only speak for myself
Some are saying you are silly, but I say you are not. You want to share a new experience together with him, not his friends.
So, given the circumstances, you should simply give up on the idea of travelling to that particular place with him. Here's my travel plan for you:
You go to the place and you hang there for a week, if this is enough time. Your BF travels a week later to a different place in Asia that you both want to go to You meet up with BF at this new place that is new to the both of you.
Or, hear me out, you go first, so you get a week or whatever is practical, to explore the place, then he travels there and you get to show each other all the things you love about the place from the same level of familiarity with it.
You are not silly.
You want to have a particular experience of this place – and you can't have that with your BF right now and that's OK. And you are an adult and a free person and he can't veto your vacation, right?
You do you, girl!
OP, if you are reading, please be aware that if he in fact does have BPD, that is tragic and sucks, but is not an excuse to treat you badly. Nothing is an excuse to treat you badly and you should still leave.
If you don't want to be treated like that in the future, he's not for you.
> Try to get a restraining order
I asked a lawyer about it, she said its impossible since my ex has never contacted me and actually has me blocked.
Also, he shared texts and screenshots but nothing that could be considered revenge porn.
So you can completely empathize with her likely situation, a situation you’ve been in yourself, and yet you still choose to assume she was cheating or was going to? This sub is full of loons.
Ok… so what? In case it turns out that's what he's doing she can always put an end to it. His intend barely matters. What's important is what she wants and it seems very much like she views him as just a good friend
Speaking to him was the right thing to do, it would been an issue on your heart long term if you had not and yall stay together.
As far as the birth control, I personally took birth control pills to control birth, and condoms to control sexually transmitted diseases. The chance that you would have them break is a higher ratio then you having the BC not work. So wouldn't hurt for the two of you to look at an alternative method to add to keep down the possibility of it happening again.