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Honestly, the sooner you contact the better IMO. However, you should take the space to get yourself grounded and resourced.
Op very simple. Give him examples on how fucked up his statement was and tell him since you put in those terms I have a confession as one of my previous exes has a bigger junk than his and was more satisfying. This will devastate him completely and then finish off by saying critiques work both ways.
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Not really, denial of affection is domestic violence in any setting
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I think something like this is good to give at your 1 year anniversary.
I would make sure tho that he would actually wear/likes brackets before doing anything.
The relationship is still in its early days and some ppl might see getting a gift like this so early on as being forward (ie they are more committed to the relationship than the other person)
It’s an awesome gift and bc it’s so personal, I would wait a bit before giving a gift like this…some ppl would see this gift as a commitment/seriousness of the relationship…he might not be at the same place as you and might not receive it the way you want at this early stage in the relationship.
That is fine I mean, its not wrong to take your time to reflect and think by yourself, if she notices it you can just explain it to her like “Im sorry some stuff is going on in my life so I may feel distant because I am thinking about it, will let you know once its over”
I'm so glad to hear that. I hope she keeps it up.
This guy only wants you as his side piece. And he was probably cheating on his “ex” with you. That’s why he’s happy for you to see other people too. He doesn’t want commitment with you or he would have chased you. But he was happy to waste your time in a fantasy. Don’t fritter away your chance of a happy reality on something that isn’t real.
Look at the next 10 years of your life so u want it to be filled of people questioning where he is? Why couldn't he be there? Do u want your life filled with pictures of you that should be pictures of the both of you? You already wasted 5 years on this guy and nothing has gotten better, no improvements, only more sulking and guilt tripping. What the point of being with him?
You guys don't align politically anymore, he's starting farther from you morally, you want to have fun and enjoy seeing and participating in the world, he is fine never leaving leaving his comfort zone. Love isn't enough to hold a relationship together you need trust and respect both of which he's shown he has none of for u by implying your cheating and “not marriage material”
The answer is clear
Yeah, I wonder if all of his friends that are going are single
Stop before it escalates and say you don’t feel what he is saying is appropriate and that you won’t engage any further when he uses that type of language. See how that works and maybe try and get some therapy to help you not feel as bad.
Dude what
Get over it.
Keep your fingers and toes crossed you don't “age poorly” in the next ten years and get a taste of some of that haterade.
We aren't in her head, we can't tell why she's doing this. It does sounds like a volatile situation regardless of the reason.
If you're in talking terms, you should ask her directly. If you aren't, do you have any way to block her from moving in with you?
He may have a slightly small penis, and is super self-conscious about it.
Yes. Break up now.
Is there literally anything redeeming about her? This “friendship” just sounds exhausting. I think maybe it's time to cut her off. If not, I think your boyfriend needs to be the one to put his foot down here and tell her how uncomfortable she is making him, how her attention and affection is too much, her coming over when he explicitly says no violates his boundaries and is disrespectful. He can be kind but he needs to be firm. It has to come from him, not you. If it comes from you, you will be framed as jealous and insecure. The object of her affection needs to shut her down.
Is he an only child ?
According to what you wrote she said she hasn't slept with anyone , past tense , she didn't say what was going to happen on the day you agree needed you to babysit OVERNIGHT.
Yeah this is done
As a retired sailor I can honestly say that the most important thing is that you’re satisfied. If she’s only happy with the 1% of you and that 1% makes up 99% of your relationship then you should go where you’re better respected. I’m sure you can find someone who likes you for who you are.
*whispers* I like stupid movies too. Anything that gets me out of my own head and makes me laugh!
Dancing with someone is not sleeping with them.
She actively discouraged romantic overtures, and you are being pissy?
This is a you problem.
You can't un-sleep with someone. It's beyond your control and if you think of her numbers as a list, you're the only person who's not crossed off. Doesn't really matter who came before you because you're the one she chose.
If you aren’t gonna stand up for yourself what is the point of posting here? The only answer is to not let him continue this behavior. You DONT have to suck his dick whenever he wants and if he can’t accept that then that’s a HIM problem.
But if you don’t want to because the manipulator won’t like you anymore (don’t see how that’s bad) then posting this isn’t going to do anything
Yes, his actions towards you as you explain them are absolutely abusive and hostile, and you should cut this person out of your life. These are not the actions of a friend, they are that of an enemy. I implore you to commit to exploring these issues with a therapist. It’s not your fault that you didn’t experience love as a child. But you are the only one who can break the toxic patterns governing your thoughts and behaviors and until you do, you won’t be happy. And you deserve to be happy.
This is what they all told u?
This is very controlling behavior. If you've been together 5 years and he is this controlling for whatever reasons he may have concocted, he's been creating these reasons long enough that he genuinely believes them. I find the odds of him coming to his senses and realizing that asking a 20-year-old woman to not wear skirts above the knee is archaic and not really a realistic boundary, then he likely will never change.
So the question is do you want to spend these years of your life in a relationship with the fashion police?
You don't get those years back, you know. Time waits for none of us.
You need psychiatric help, or at the very least, a new hobby.
Oh, it’s kind of you to look for an admirable reason too, but your last two sentences aren’t true.
Ppl with really high responsibility jobs often do more working out and more disciplined stress relief, because they need, their clients need it, and their families need it.
Your first sentence was correct. I’m not sure you can fix that unfortunately. He’s taking his stress out on you and that’s not ok. You can try to entice him into yoga, meditation, workouts or creative pursuits before he gets home or as soon as he gets home.
You can be indirect: send him articles about job stress and its effects and how to cope. Hope he catches the hint.
You can be honest: “I know you don’t mean to, but you’re taking the stress of your job out on me 3-4x/wk which is a lot. I love you very much, but it’s not ok with me to bear the brunt of your job stress, and I really worry about your long-term health because of it. It’s not healthy for you to just keep the stress in. I’m asking you to join a sports team or a workout group, do yoga and meditation or VR workouts with me for 45min when you get home each day, or do something else you’d like to try that has evidence of providing healthy, active stress relief. Can you pick one to try?”
Being polite gets women killed.