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64 thoughts on “Vannesahills online sex chats for YOU!

  1. I feel like im the guy in my rs, im just honestly realizing it now. Like a ice bucket of water just poured into my head, is it better to break up with my gf now so i won't hurt her anymore?

  2. I do not, for a second, regret my abortion. Be careful who you have kids with because once that baby is here, he and his family will be in your life for a very, very long time.

    I don’t want to lecture you because you’re gonna do what you want but being 100%-no-bullshit, don’t go through with this. You’ve got some confusing and exciting times ahead of you, don’t blurr your twenties with a kid and some tactless rando.

    You got this.

  3. My thoughts too. It's likely he might love her, he just doesn't express it in a language she knows and understands.

    Still, that's no reason to stay together. I recommend finding someone who's fluent in the same love language, or at least someone who's willing to accommodate yours.

  4. I think as you get older it matters less. Especially when you hit 30 it seems less of a “20 year old girl, 40 year old man” thing.

    for example, if you were 40 and he was 55 people probably wouldn't think twice.

  5. Well, she clearly didn't know going in. I know people who have figured out after being married that they are gay or transgender. OP's ex doesn't seen to have even gotten that far. She has figured she is not sexually attracted to him and doesn't wang to have sex. But she probably feels some romantic attraction for him or dhe wouldn't try to keep him. That is probably confusing her too.

  6. That's a horrible situation for both of you and you have my sympathy. All you can really do is be 100% supportive and be there for him when he needs you.

    It'll be a tough ride (I've been in his position sadly). I wish I had spent more time with my father before he passed, taken more photos etc so try and help your bf do that maybe?

  7. FFS go read the damn post before telling someone who obviously read the post they are giving poor advice, when it is you who are giving poor advice.

    Jesus it is not that very hot to do

  8. I dated a 36 years old being myself 25 (this year) I would not recommend it. You think that it doesn't matter but with little time it shows that age gap is important.

  9. Grooming is when an older person (usually an adult) finds a younger person and manipulates them into an inappropriate relationships. Adults shouldn’t be in romantic relationships with teenagers or children, and especially when there’s a power imbalance (usually caused by age but you said he was also your tutor) because it causes an unhealthy relationship dynamic

  10. The problem here is that if your only contact with this person is texting a few nights a week this isn't really a “relationship”. You might be trying to lay the groundwork for some later relationship when you can actually spend time together. But for now you're just sort of occasional penpals of a sort. If you want a real relationship you're probably either going to have to wait until she's free of her parental restrictions or you'll need to go find that with someone else whose parents aren't quite as strict.

  11. I just meant more like a one time thing. Like asking her to be submissive once cause I think it would help with the attraction to her sister.

    I prefer my girlfriend's dominant personality in general. I guess it's just more of a curiosity thing because of how unique the circumstances are here

  12. It's definitely your anger talking. Your wife was open and honest with you about something out of her control that she wanted to handle as a team. Don't use it as a reason to go and hate fuck someone else, you will never forgive yourself and your marriage will never recover.

    Stick with counselling and end this open season, do what we want arrangement. She chose YOU.

  13. Agreed. If I were him I might say nicely and positively (I’d I DO want to get married) that I appreciate her wanting marriage and that she took the initiative, but that I’d like the moment to be a little more direct and possibly more memorable. Tell her that while you’re happy, you feel bad that you didn’t quite understand what was happening at the time.

    Or the tldr is to communicate that one of you needs to say “will you marry me?” I think if you just check that box and are open with her, you might have the best funny engagement story to tell.. “I was so oblivious that we got engaged, and I found out a week later!”

  14. 6 years is way more time than I would have given before expecting a marriage. Got engaged in 3 and married in 5 personally, a lot more reasonable. Stop wasting her time ffs.

  15. Simply saying someone is cheating because they enjoy time with friends is insane.

    Do I think OPs girlfriend should be partying her face off at 36? No, but its her life – and her life affects OPs life.

    Its more complex than “girls nights out = cheating”.

    What you're suggesting is insane.

  16. Is it really that or are your beard irritating her skin and making her feel pain too ? Do you groom your beard well enough ? Do you use products so it won't hurt her skin ?

  17. You're right, it doesn't excuse it, but it explains it. I agree that it doesn't make someone any less guilty of what they do.

  18. i think i would be on the phone telling my dad. I bet he would be helping you get out of this situation in a hurry / with rent with lawyers with everything!!

  19. The fact that you called someone a mutual friend when you clearly said she's not interested in getting to know you is laughable.

    Friends don't: ~disrespect a couple's relationship boundaries ~show disinterest in getting to know you ~ignore you

    Then you buy gifts so she can leave your “boyfriend” alone. Let me tell you this. A man who loves you will NEVER entertain another woman. There would be no such arguments.

    You are a third wheel. Most likely his side chick. It seems as if you met her thru him. You're not mutual friends. That's his friend. May even be his ex. She doesn't like him because she wants him. She doesn't care for you because you're in her way. She's fighting for what he wants while you sit around being gullible, oblivious and dumbfounded.

    Your “boyfriend' has no respect for you. He's allowing all this because he thinks you're stupid and that you'll believe anything he says because you have no backbone or standards.

    What should you do? Do what makes you happy. You've allowed everything to go on knowing exactly what's going on so let that man cheat in peace.

  20. The bottom line is that you cannot, you can't change someone. Perhaps in the beginning she presented herself as your ideal partner, perhaps things have changed over time. What you have now is who she is and that isn't someone who is compatible with your values.

    You don't want to hurt her feelings or confidence so you are what? Waiting until she decides that your example is so great that she should copy you?

    People do things for rewards or to avoid something. Basic motivation is either there or not there and her focus at 30 is to have children and focus on that.

    You are not in the same headspace as she is in this relationship.

    You are actually hurting her by tiptoeing around the issue as she could well find someone who is happy with who she is right now, someone who wants a homebody who will focus on the home and children and not need anything else in their lives.

    Bottom line is that the person you met is not the person you have now, either accept that or don't but stop waiting around for a magic change in her values and needs because it isn't going to happen and if she did it would be from an external pressure like you breaking up and it would not last as a permanent change in her.

  21. Oh, I'm not saying anything about this circumstance, especially as I had an abusive ex who did EXACTLY what her bf is doing. I think it's more than likely she is being manipulated and I put in my comment on the post (not this reply) that she should download one of those apps that record your sleep so she can independently find out if it's actually happening before getting further involved in the conflict he is trying to create.

    I'm just saying that I don't agree your partner having sex dreams about someone else is the same as you having dreams about your partner cheating. That's very different.

  22. True. Do you think im over reacting? I wanna get over this but at the same time his best friend may be a cheater and I dont wanna be around him. And its not like im going to go ask his wife if she was okay with it. Thats not my place

  23. Easy…..✨leave him✨

    And I hope u cut off that “best friend”! Open relationship or not NEVER sleep with your friends bf/ex ?

  24. Yeah, exactly. I can see that being the case for like a teenager, maybe, but she's 37! If that is the case, I'd be more concerned about her lack of a backbone.

  25. I can agree on statistics. My parents marriage is horrible and my mum has been stuck in it. I did ask them once about leaving but mum said ‘love isn’t everything, you need someone who will also support you with money’. She hurt her back when she was younger and dad supported her so I guess this played a part.

  26. He wants half your paycheck in an account only he controls? And you’re not married, so you may have no legal protections if things go south?

    Haha, no. Only put your money in an account you have access to, and that requires your consent before money can be moved.

  27. Hey just FYI Snapchat saves everything on their back end. Just bc you didn’t save it doesn’t mean it’s lost forever.

    You have to contact Snapchat and ask them to send you all your data related to your account. They’ll email you within a day or two with all your previous messages and who you contacted.

    If you still want to get this guy you still have options.

  28. Then maybe consider staying single and working on your self-respect, determining what you want in a partner, and what behaviour and respect they should exhibit.

    And also not being afraid to walk away if they don't meet it.

  29. When after being silent most of your life, you start asserting yourself, it can come off rather awkwardly. I speak from experience.

    So I think both of you are right – you should be free to express yourself – and you should be more refined in what you say to whom. That's not a big criticism, just a little suggestion.

  30. You need to get out of this marriage. I’d also be getting some serious legal advice about this all and I’d definitely be telling the other women.

    If they were still identical, they could have tried pulling this again ‘wow, miracle baby!’ I’m assuming he’s only wanting to do it the ‘natural way’ as lifestyle choices have rendered this impossible.

  31. It does sound like a bit of bad forbodeing to me. You had no idea what a LDR would feel to you and he went through with it nonetheless, so I would say it's mostly on him, for putting you in a spot you don't feel comfortable in and expecting you to suck it up. I don't think you would be wrong to break up at that point. Sorry if that sounds harsh.

  32. “As the title says, my boyfriend thinks using our savings for a “big” wedding is a bad use of using our savings”.

    It’s the first sentence of the post. They didn’t specify all necessarily but the whole thing revolves around their savings.

  33. Don’t leave it up to her. That’s your problem.

    Get the stroller, make some water bottles and say “let’s go walk together.”

    Do the dishes and get the laundry started and then put on prenatal yoga and ask her to do it with you.

    Don’t sit there and just wait around for her to ask.

    Look up WeightWatchers zero point meals and snacks and you do the work to have these things readily available for her.

    Care about her body as much as you do yours. She’s taking care of and growing your children… you take care of her

  34. OP,

    Our brains are not fully developed until around 25. When I was a much younger man, it was looks, I know, I hang my head in shame for just writing this. Then as I got older and wiser, it was about how we treated each other and the things we had in common. It took me until I was 28 to find my now wife. We have been together since 2001 and married almost 22 years.

    Your dad wants the best for you, just like my father did, but mine would harp instead of seriously talking about a subject. His way or no way. You might be the only daughter and he is over protective of you. Please don't just jump into something for convenience. Take your time and find that match even if he is older. It's your life, your happiness. Just don't do the relationship to get away from a parent. Most of those end up in divorce for choosing unwisely.

  35. Stay with your mom. If you and your bf are meant to be, you'll make it work, and he'll be understanding of your situation. If he isn't, he's not the one. Also, keep in mind that when you say things like “finally met such an amazing guy” – you're only 20. You've got a very long life ahead of you, and even if this doesn't work, you'll meet plenty of other guys. Concentrate on your mom because you can find another boyfriend if you need to, but you only have one of her.

  36. If he hasn’t been willing to propose what makes you think he’d accept a proposal? And why would you want to propose to someone who won’t propose to you?

  37. If you’re renting now and living by yourself you should have an understanding of what rents are like in your area. If not, do some investigating. One way is to check Zillow. If the house he is interested in buying is on there, they have an estimate of what it could get to rent it out. Agree to pay half of what it would cost to rent and half of the utilities. If he wants more then he will have to agree to pay back everything above that amount (with interest) if you break up or sell the house. Put it in writing, have a lawyer make sure it’s legal and have it notarized.

  38. You go to your friend’s and she goes to hers. It’s the only fair solution and likely the best for you.

  39. Exactly. Look at that. Power play.

    “Hey look everything’s good”

    “My knee is still fucked”

    “Okay what else can I do for you?”

    Text book manipulation tactics. Distance yourself – it was her choice to learn to skate (I used to skate so I know it’s not a surprise she fell – lol like 99% of it is falling until you learn to land the trick yea?)

    It was her choice to not get medical attention

    It was her choice to not do the PT after.

    Not one of these choices were made by you and yet, you seem to be rooting the bill.

    Cut it off.

  40. You are entitled to say no any time you want. Its totally normal to not be in the mood for whatever reason or to not like to do certain activities. It’s also totally normal for him to be disappointed when you say no. If he punishes you or guilt trips you after you say no, that is not normal and is actually manipulative and needs to be addressed immediately. If there is a certain thing that you don’t want to do at all, tell him that’s off limits and to respect your boundaries and stop asking. That way he doesn’t have to get disappointed every time you say no and you don’t have to feel pressured to say yes to something you don’t want to do.

  41. I think if we didn’t have kids together, I’d be in a completely different situation right now. I do care for him and he is a good father to our kids (when he’s not stressed out, he gets triggered very easily) it’s just very hot cause he’s all I’ve ever known. He is a good guy, I just need more from him but I’m so close to just calling it what it is, and just doing what’s best for myself and my boys. Cause at the end of the day, his lack of effort and affection is causing major insecurities and resentment.

  42. There are lots of things that you should be willing to forgive as simple human weakness.

    Intentional deception is not one of them.

  43. Your welcome lol i get it. U dont want to waste your time too. Why i said take it as it comes. If it makes u feel better u still have time lol ur young enough. My husband is like 4 years older than u and we are only just expecting our first child and he was 30 when we got married.

    Enjoy the dating phase! It's exciting. Have a good one dude! ?

  44. You’re mad that he came on your back? I think you need to rethink your position. That is the most normal place from doggy. Maybe he wanted to see it on you. Warm towel and you’re clean. You’re both not wrong but you’re both not right. If you are falling out of it you need to talk it out or walk away and don’t waste his time

  45. I feel like i’m in the same exact situation, even the ages are correct?I’ve been telling myself that because of my past relationships being from extreme high to extreme low, they made me addicted to it. The feeling of almost breaking up and then ending up together might feel like love wins, but it’s just unhealthy attachment. In this current relationship everything goes smoothly, there is no fighting (maybe small disagreements that are normal), and now suddenly you don’t have anything to ”prove” that you care about eachother because you haven’t experienced the ”almost breaking up but not being able to leave eachother alone” phase.

    It is very hot to explain because english is not my first language, but I hope you get the point in my comment. I’d say that you don’t have to worry. If you feel uncertain, think about the things where you are really different from eachother. Dealbreakers that would make you uncompatible. I’m talking about something like ”he wants kids but I don’t” which obviously makes you different in a ”bad” way. Maybe it helps you realize that you actually are compatible with eachother and the problems you seem to have might only be small issues that are fixable, such as him not understanding that sometimes you need to have a deep talk without him making jokes etc. Good luck!?


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